Callie's Ultimate Warrior Cat Talk Show of Randomness!
by Stormy Skyz
Summary: Well, it's back, it's bad, and it's wackier than ever! Join Callie and her fellow co-hostesses as they interview, endure craziness, and maybe go a little insane(r)! Will Callie ever become deranged? Will Swiftleaf ever become a pie freak? Answers will be revealed! (NOTE: My co-host/co-hostess positions are all filled, sorry! But review your cat and he/she will be interviewed!)
1. S1: E1 - Hollyleaf

_**A/N: Hello, my faithful readers and reviewers! I am back from the dead! Just kidding; I never really died. Anywho, I had a lot of people asking me to put this back up and felt guilty for leaving on you guys. Remember that I am a slow updater (:P) and ALSO REMEMBER THAT THE SEARCH FOR CO-HOSTS HAS BEEN CANCELLED! I hate to turn people away, but if there's more co-hosts than I can remember I start excluding them because I have a painfully bad memory. D: And then I feel guilty and must pinch my cat's cheeks to calm myself. ANYWAY, ahem… if you DO review with an OC for me to INTERVIEW, remember to include, in no particular order:**_

_**Name:**_

_**Gender:**_

_**Clan:**_

_**Appearance:**_

_**Personality (at least 3 things):**_

_**And anything else you wish to include! Now enough of my babble. Go read! (:**_

**Season 1: Episode 1**

**Hollyleaf**

**Sparkle: **Welcome, welcome, welcome to the first episode of the _Warrior Cats Talk Show!_ *glares at Callie* Please think of an original name.

**Callie: ***rolls eyes* Whatever. Anyway, *coughs and turns to audience* I would like to go over a few rules.

**Sparkle: **Okay, okay. *bounces excitedly* Can we go now?

**Callie: ***glares* Hold your bananas. I'm getting to that. *looks back up at audience, slightly annoyed but trying to hide it* Also, if would like, PM me! I love PMs and reviews because I'm Callie and that's how I roll.

**Sparkle: ***is desperately clutching bananas* Can we go YET?

**Callie: **For Heaven's sake! *turns to cameras* Please call in security just in case while I finish the rules!

**Sparkle: ***starts chewing on a banana* Hollyleaf is our first guest, right?

**Callie: **Sparkle, for the last time...

**Sparkle: ***takes deep breath and turns to camera* HI! My name's Sparkle and I have issues do you have issues because I have issues do you have any friends who have issues because I would like to be your friend...but of course if I WAS your friend and I have issues then you would have friends with issues, RIGHT?

**Callie: ***tries not to lose it* Okay, now we can call in Hollyleaf!

**Sparkle: **FINALLY! After you make me wait for six hundred years! HOLLYLEAF!

**Callie: ***smacks head as Hollyleaf walks in*

**Hollyleaf: ***is covered in shreds of catnip and is holding a flag between her teeth*

**Callie: **Hello, Hollyleaf! Welcome to the show! So, to get started, how'd you feel to be a medicine cat and then replaced by your blind brother and become a warrior?

**Hollyleaf: ***mutters something inaudible around her flag*

**Callie: **Amazing! Did you ever feel like you were ever to bossy during your apprenticeship?

**Hollyleaf: ***mutters something inaudible around her flag*

**Callie: **Really! Why do you think you were named Holly_leaf_?

**Hollyleaf: ***mutters something inaudible around her flag*

**Callie: **I would never have thought of that. So what'd you think of Ashfur?

**Hollyleaf: ***mutters something inaudible around her flag*

**Callie: **Wow! Some anger issues! Last question; why'd you kill a cat for what he was going to do and then do it yourself, not only to your Clanmates but broadcast for every cat in the Clans to know?

**Hollyleaf: ***mutters something inaudible around her flag*

**Callie: **Oh I *cough* see *cough* Well anyway, *turns to crowd* What an interesting interview, folks! *watches with fake pity as Hollyleaf wraps herself in a cloak and jumps off the stage, landing splat in the middle of the crowd with no one to catch her* She's so misunderstood!

**Sparkle: **OOH! OOH! Like MEEEEEEEEE!

**Callie: **Yes, Sparkle, no one understands you. Thank you for watching and we'll see you next chapter! *cough* Episode!

**Message: **This program was brought to you by Callie's typing fingers and viewers like you! Thank you!

**Sparkle: **You're welcome.


	2. S1: E2 - Heavystep

**Season 1: Episode 2**

**Heavystep**

**Callie:** Hello, folks! Welcome back to the second episode of Callie's Warrior Cat Talk Show! *droops*

**Sparkle:** O_O YOU SAD, BRO? WHYYYY?

**Callie:** *glares* I'm stuck with you. Isn't that reason enough?

**Sparkle:** *whines* BUT THAT MEANS I HAVE TO PUT UP WITH YOUUUUUUU!

**Callie:** Yes, well, I'm not half as bad as you. *turns to audience* Our viewer today is Heavystep!

**Sparkle:** Who's that?

**Callie:** *rolls eyes as Heavystep pads onto stage* He's the thickset tabby tom in RiverClan.

**Sparkle:** OH! The one who always died and came back to life; yeah, I remember him.

**Callie:** So, Heavystep, welcome to my Talk Show.

**Heavystep:** *sits down and begins stuffing his face with spaghetti* Hrrlow ere.

**Callie:** *looks disgusted* Um...how's the spaghetti?

**Heavystep**: *doesn't pause in eating* Mph.

**Callie:** Awesome! *mouths to camera* Get the spaghetti off the stage! NOW!

**Camera Cat:** *goes over and punts the tray of spaghetti across the stage where it lands on someone's head in the audience*

**Person:** AUGH!

**Heavystep:** *groans* Hey, where am I?

**Callie:** My talk show. *groans as he orders another plate of spaghetti* Well Heavystep, how did it feel to die and come back three times?

**Heavystep:** Painful. Creamed spinach is better than reincarnations.

**Callie:** Do you think you'll live forever?

**Heavystep:** Dunno. Mothwing told me to lay off on the food because I'm twenty-three pounds already and she says it's unhealthy for a cat to be that fat, so probably not.

**Sparkle**: Then why are you still eating?

**Heavystep:** 'Cause I like food. Got a problem with that?

**Sparkle:** *starts bawling*

**Callie:** *starts shoving Heavystep along as the stage floods with tears* Okay, okay, keep going. You had your chances now get that spaghetti out of here! I'm trying to keep my girlish figure and you're making me HUNGRY.

**Heavystep:** *gobbles down the rest of the spaghetti as well as the tray*

**Callie:** YIPE! *jumps on Sparkle's head* He's DERANGED!

**Sparkle:** *reasonably, for once* But so are you.

**Callie:** Oh, right. Oh well. *turns to audience* See you next time!


	3. S1: E3 - Darkstripe

_**A/N: :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D Just because…. O.O…..**_

_**Scarletpool: In answer to your review, I haven't made any changes to my former talk show (except for grammar mistakes. GRRRRR I HATE grammar mistakes). There's like 18 chapters (O_O ) and after that, yes, Redtail will be our next guest. :D**_

_**Ah, crud. I forgot the disclaimer. Sparkle, say the disclaimer.**_

_**Sparkle: NINJAS! *chicken dance***_

_***facepalm***_

_**I don't own the Warrior cats, OC reviewers, or OC guests. I only own Callie and Sparkle 'cause they were my original characters.**_

**Season 1: Episode 3**

**Darkstripe**

**Callie:** Hi –

**Sparkle:** CALLIEEEEE! You always introduce the show!

**Callie:** That's not true! I let you introduce the show on the first episode!

**Sparkle:** Yeah, and it's MY turn!

**Callie:** Ugh. Go ahead. We're already five minutes into the show.

**Sparkle:** ARE NOT!

**Callie:** *pushes away* Hello and welcome to my show! This is Sparkle, my very messed-up-in-the-head co-hostess. PLEASE SAVE ME, PEOPLE!

**Sparkle:** *yells* YOU'RE MESSED UP TOOOOOOOO!

**Callie:** Very true. DAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARKSTRIIIIIIIIIIIIIIPE!

**Sparkle:** *whispers* Mommy.

**Darkstripe:** *limps out onto stage* What do you fools want? *snarls*

**Callie:** I should skip the welcome just because of that.

**Sparkle**: *runs over to* TURTLE!

**Hollyleaf:** *magically appears onto stage* TURTLE!

**Both:** TURTLE TURTLE TURTLE TURTLE TURRRRRRRRRTTTTTLLLLLEEE!

**Callie:** AHHH! Where did Hollyleaf come from? *punts across stage into the crowd*

*cricket cricket*

**Darkstripe:** Hellooo? Still here!

**Sparkle:** *skips in circles* Ring around the rosy! Pocket full of posy!

**Darkstripe:** Hey! How do you know what a pocket is?

**Sparkle:** How do YOU know what a pocket is?

**Darkstripe:** …..

*CRICKET CRICKET*

**Callie:** Okay, well the audience should be getting bored now, so I'll start asking questions. So, Darkstripe, what was it like to transform from a she-cat to a tom?

**Darkstripe:** Very strange. I think–

**Callie:** DARKSTRIPE! Not in front of the kids.

**Darkstripe:** Oh. Sorry.

**Callie:** Enough about that. Did you ever find a mate?

**Darkstripe:** No. Everyone so freaked out about the she-cat incident...

**Callie:** Lots of people hated you. Did your mom think you were a loser too? Your dad? Your siblings?

**Darkstripe**: I don't know. Tigerstar and I decided to poke a little fun with our families and threw them off cliffs.

**Callie:** …..

**Darkstripe:** Okay, well, I'm going to go visit Rowanclaw and talk about how much I miss being a she-cat.

**Sparkle:** *yells after him as he runs away* YOU WERE BORN A TOM!

**Callie:** Well! That was a strange and – I'm sorry to say – short episode, but I guess it'll work! Have a good night… *stumbles* er, day, or afternoon... WHATEVER IT IS FOR YOU everybody and I'll see you next time!

_**A/N: Thank you to everyone who's reviewing, following, and favorite-ing! It makes my day :') **_


	4. S1: E4 - Jayfeather

**Season 1: Episode 4**

**Jayfeather and Eaglekit**

**Callie: ***in a bored tone* Hello and welcome to the fourth episode of my talk sho–

**Sparkle: ***bursts in* CALLIE! CALLIE! YOU GOTTA COME SEE!

**Callie: **What do you want?

**Sparkle: **WE GOT OUR FIRST CO-HOSTESS!

**Callie: ***starts partying*

*a kit pads in while the two she-cats are having a wild dance party*

**Kit: **Is this is a crazy dance party or a crazy crazy dance party?

**Callie: **That's our new host? YAY!

**Sparkle: ***clears throat and tries to act sophisticated* This is Eaglekit of OakClan. She's two moons old, but don't judge her by her size. What else can I say? I'M AWFUL AT SUMMARIES!

**Callie: ***pats on head* That's okay. Eaglekit, get ready for randomness!

**Eaglekit: **Um... *angel voice* I wanted to ask... could I ask the first few questions to our guest?

**Sparkle: **PLEASE! CAN SHE?

**Callie: ***looks at script* Jayfeather!

**Sparkle: ***starts screaming*

**Eaglekit: ***grins evilly and randomly for no apparent reason*

**Callie: **Watch out for the sign, Jayfeather! We do NOT need a concussion on stage!

**Jayfeather: ***BANG* OUCHIES!

**Eaglekit**: I thought he was blind, not deaf!

**Callie: **Me too. JAYFEATHER! GET OVER HERE!

**Jayfeather: **HIIIIIIIII! *screams in usual fashion*

**Sparkle: **Am I related to you?

**Eaglekit: ***gives her a creepy death glare* That technically counts as a question and I'M asking the questions!

**Sparkle: **WAAAAAAAAAAAAA!

**Callie and Eaglekit: **O_O

**Jayfeather: ***starts stuffing face with pie*

**Callie: **JAYFEATHER! *tiredly* Eaglekit, ask him questions.

**Eaglekit: **So, Jayfeather–

**Sparkle: **CHERRY PIE! GIMME!

**Callie: **Mind your manners! *grabs a random stick and starts whacking her co-hostess with it-

**Jayfeather: ***turns into a robot voice* Do not disrespect stick. Do not disrespect stick. Total world explosion in five. Four. Three. Two.

**Callie: ***screams and throws Jayfeather out the window*

*explosion*

**Eaglekit: **Can I ask him the questions now?

**Callie: **Sure! Let me just get Jayfeather. JAYYYYYYFEATHERRRRRR!

**Jayfeather: ***walks onto stage straight for the same sign*

**Callie: **Watch out for the sign, Jayfeather! We do NOT need a concussion on stage!

**Jayfeather: ***BANG* OUCHIES!

**Eaglekit: **I thought he was blind, not deaf!

**Callie: **Me too. JAYFEATHER! GET OVER HERE!

**Jayfeather: **HIIIIIIIII! *screams in usual fashion*

**Sparkle: **Why are we repeating this?

**Eaglekit: **Good question, but I'M the one that's supposed to be asking questions. So – NO ONE INTERRUPT OR I WILL TICKLE YOU – Jayfeather, do you drink orange juice?

**Callie: ***eye twitch*

**Jayfeather: **Sure! I've heard Twolegs talking about it when Stickette and I went on our first date!

**Callie and Sparkle**: *speechless and eye twitch*

**Eaglekit: **Cool! How about sunflowers? Do you like sunflowers?

**Jayfeather: **Sure! Stickette loves them so I do too.

**Sparkle**: *falls over*

**Eaglekit: **Awesome. So I heard a lot about this Stickette. Are you and Stickette madly in love?

**Jayfeather: ***hugs his stick* Yes! Yes! We had a kitten!

**Callie: ***twitches*

**Eaglekit: **Amazing! Do you listen to Lady Gaga?

**Jayfeather: **I've never heard of this strange language called Lady Gaga.

**Callie: **...

**Eaglekit: **Absolutely astonishing. Have you ever walked on a rainbow before?

**Jayfeather: **What's a rainbow?

**Eaglekit: **Cool-aid. Last question, Jayfeather! Are you a duck?

**Jayfeather: **I think I'm a squirrel but I can't be sure.

**Eaglekit: **Astonishing. Okay Callie, wrap up the interview!

**Callie and Sparkle: ***are lying on their backs twitching*

**Eaglekit: **Well okay then! I guess our interview can continue a few more hours!

**Jayfeather: **YAY! Wait, what? I can't. I'm going to Golden Corral at 7 with Stickette.

**Eaglekit: **Fine. OUT! *punts through window and throws the stick after him* Callie? Sparkle? You awake?

*no reply*

**Eaglekit: **Oh well. *shrugs* You look for the next episode while I try to bring these two back from the dead.

_**A/N: Remember that I wrote these when I was younger (like 2 years ago) and my sense of humor has improved muchly since then, so the chapters stink right now. They'll get better, I promise! (:**_


	5. S1: E5 - Scourge & Silverfreckle

**Season 1: Episode 5**

**Scourge and Silverfreckle**

**Eaglekit: **Welcome back!

**Callie: **We have another co-hostess among us!

**Sparkle and Eaglekit: **OOH! OOH! WE DO? WE DO? LET US SEE! *bounces around her*

**Callie: ***picks up script and reads from it* Her name is Silverfreckle and she's funny and good at making jokes... OH MY GOSH! *jaw drops to the floor of the stage*

**Sparkle/Eaglekit: **WHAT IS IT? WHAT IS IT?

**Callie: **SHE CAN FLY!

*as if on cue, a light brown she-cat with silver dapples flies onto stage, hovering a few feet above it*

**Sparkle: ***screams* GHOST!

**Silverfreckle: **Wha?

**Eaglekit: **RUN AWAY! *runs into Sparkle over and over again, screaming*

**Callie: **Welcome, Silverfreckle. Please don't mind my messed-up co-hostesses and–

**Sparkle: **YOU'RE MESSED UP TOO!

**Callie: **–make yourself at home.

**Silverfreckle: **Thanks. *starts munching on a cherry pie*

**Callie: **Okay, guys. Let's start before we waste more pages.

**Sparkle: **But I want a pie!

**Silverfreckle: ***flies up to the ceiling and eats pie*

**Callie: ***ties Sparkle up* YOU CAN COME DOWN NOW!

**Sparkle: **Can I ask Scourge the questions?

**Silverfreckle**: You pick Scourge for my opening day? Oh, that's a corker.

*blink*

**Callie: **Well anyway. SCOURGE!

**Scourge: ***walks unhappily onto stage* What do you animals want?

**Callie: **You're as mean as Darkstripe!

**Scourge: **Well, I AM The Great Scourge. And I wish to be called The Great Scourge.

**Sparkle: **The Great Scourge is about as great as dirt. You let Firestar kill you. YOUR OWN HALF BROTHER!

**Scourge: ***glares* Why is she in a cage?

**Eaglekit: **WE ask the questions**. **

**Silverfreckle: ***is munching on a peach pie now* So, Scourge, do like purple?

**Scourge: **No. Why?

**Silverfreckle: **No reason. Would you like your whiskers plucked to make you look girly? I think it'd be an improvement. You're smaller than Eaglekit and you're like forty years old.

**Scourge**: *flips hair/fur* SO not true! I'm only thirty-nine!

**Eaglekit: **The point is you're about as ferocious as a flea.

**Callie: **Exactly. Sparkle, you ask the next question.

**Sparkle: ***snore*

**Silverfreckle: **We bored her to death! *finishes peach pie* Are my jokes really that bad? *pulls out a pumpkin pie and starts eating*

**Callie: ***twitch* Well...

**Silverfreckle: **So anyway, Scourge. Do you like randomness?

**Scourge: **Random cats are weak and should be executed immediately.

**Sparkle: ***wakes up immediately* Such foul language! *glances at Eaglekit* You DO know we have young ears here!

**Scourge: **DON'T TELL ME WHAT TO DO, JAILBIRD!

**Sparkle: **DON'T TELL ME WHAT TO DO, TINY!

**Scourge: **It. Is. ON.

**Eaglekit: **I do not have young ears!

**Callie: **HOLD IT! HOLD IT! HOLD IT!

**Everyone: ***pauses*

**Callie**: First of all, Sparkle, get back in your cage. Second of all, Silverfreckle, put that pie down. Third of all, yes, Eaglekit, you DO have young ears. Last of all, Scourge, GET YOUR TAIL OFF THE SHOW!

**Everyone but Scourge: ***cheers*

**Scourge: **DON'T TELL ME WHAT TO DO!

**Callie: **I am the one typing here so I CAN crush you under a giant pillow.

**Scourge: **Pillows can't crush people. I mean, cats.

**Callie: **They can in my books! OFF THE SHOW!

**Scourge: ***runs away as she gets out a giant, thick pillow and threatens to smash him with it*

**Silverfreckle: ***turns to audience* Very random show today! *nods* I hope they're all like this! Anyway, have a good night everyone, and see you next time!

_**A/N: There seems to be a pattern here. These cats are such GRUMPS! It's so CUTE! ^_^**_


	6. S1: E6 - Ferncloud & Moonrain

**Season 1: Episode 6**

**Ferncloud and Moonrain**

**Callie: **Callie here, welcoming you back to another *looks at script* heartwarming, hilarious, messed-up, all-aged fun, silly, weirdo episode of Callie's Ultimate Warrior Talk Show of Randomness!

**Silverfreckle: ***floats down munching on a key lime pie* Do we have any new co-hostesses?

**Callie**: Yes, one, actually! Her name is Moonrain and she's from SecretClan. Crazy... likes catnip pies... *looks up, annoyed* Why does everyone like pie so much?

**Silverfreckle: **O_O Can she fly?

**Callie: **No...

**Sparkle: ***runs in* Where's the new hostess?

**Callie: **Where's Eaglekit?

**Sparkle: **She's trying to coax the temperamental guests onto the show.

**Callie: **When did we all turn into psychiatrists? *facepalm*

**Eaglekit**: *trots in with head and tail high*

**Callie: **Where are our guests, Eaglekit? And where's Moonrain?

**Eaglekit: ***stops in tracks and blushes* We have some minor difficulties.

**Sparkle: **?

**Callie: ***facepalm* Spit it out, Eaglekit.

**Eaglekit: **Crowfeather and his horde of she-cats got into a big fight on their way here.

**Silverfreckle**: What does that have to do with Moonrain?

**Callie: ***mutter* Wasting pages!

**Eaglekit: **Well, it got random and everyone accused her of padding after Crowfeather *looks at screen* OH MY GOSH WE'RE ROLLING!

**Callie: **Good observation. We'll have to call in a minor character for need be.

**Silverfreckle: **Should I go get Moonrain?

**Callie: **TAKE SPARKLE WITH YOU!

**Silverfreckle: ***straps a jet pack to Sparkle and tugs her along by her tail*

**Callie: ***blinks* Well, welcome back to the show, I guess. We'll get Ferncloud in here as fast as possible.

**Ferncloud: ***shoots up onto stage* Ohmygosh, ohmygosh, ohmygosh I am actually on TV! First of all, I would like to thank my darling mate Dustpelt, my millions of kits, Spiderleg, Shrewpaw, Larchkit, Hollykit, Birchfall, Icecloud, and Foxleap, and my millions of daughter- and sister-in-laws, Daisy, Whitewing, Toadstep and Rosepetal, and their kits as well, Dovewing, Ivypool, Toadstep, and Rosepetal!

**Eaglekit: **Wait. Dustpelt is your mate. Your living kits are Spiderleg, Birchfall, Icecloud, and Foxleap. Spiderleg and Daisy, Birchfall and Whitewing, Icecloud and Toadstep, and Foxleap and Rosepetal are all couples. Spiderleg and Daisy's kits are Rosepetal and Toadstep. Birchfall and Whitewing's kits are Dovewing and Ivypool. Icecloud and Toadstep, Rosepetal and Foxleap have no kits.

**Sparkle: **Wait a darn moment! If Icecloud and Foxleap are your kits, then wouldn't they be step-aunt and step-uncle to Rosepetal and Toadstep! EWWW!

**Ferncloud: **You're not supposed to think about it that hard!

**Callie: ***twitch* Okay, Ferncloud, would you like to talk about anything in particular?

**Ferncloud: **Sure! My kits!

**Eaglekit: **Ugh. Boring. Anything else?

**Ferncloud: **Sure! My mate!

**Sparkle: **Anything ELSE?

**Ferncloud: **Sure! My kits!

**Callie: **Okay, we'll talk about Dustpelt first. How'd you meet him?

**Ferncloud: **He mentored my brother.

**Callie: **Strange...Did he ever talk to you about Sandstorm?

**Ferncloud: **Sandstorm? Who's that? Is she a WindClan cat? Or am I thinking of Runningbrook?

**Everyone: ***facepalm*

**Ferncloud: **Anyway, I don't know who this Sandstorm woman is but whoever she is, STAY OUT OF MY RELATIONSHIP.

**Callie: **This is getting a bit to graphical for my opinion. Should we move on to your kits?

**Ferncloud**: My kits!

**Callie: **Oookay...

**Ferncloud: **My precious, sweet, adorable, darling, valuable, precious, sweet, darling kits! I was so heartbroken when Shrewpaw and Larchkit and Hollykit died and I'm disappointed in Dustpelt for not keeping them alive and I was so heartbroken! Now that I have kits and great-grand kits and great-great-grand kits and great-great-great-grand kits and great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-grand kits, I'M SO HAPPY! And when I died in the books, I was so happy to be reunited with my dead kits again!

**Everyone: ***twitch*

**Ferncloud: **I'll start with talking about my precious, darling, sweet, adorable kit named Spiderleg. He was my firstborn, EVER. He was always the strongest and always the most adorable, WITH CUTE WITTLE CHUBBY CHEEKS!

**Spiderleg: ***from offstage* MOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM**!**

**Callie: **Okay, Ferncloud, it looks like we're out of time! *shoves off stage*

**Ferncloud: **MY KITS!

**Callie: **WHERE IS MOONRAIN?

**Silverfreckle/Sparkle: ***fly in, Sparkle holding on to Silverfreckle's tail and another cat dangling from her paws*

**Silverfreckle: **STOP THE SHOW! She's here!

**Moonrain: ***drops on the stage next to Callie and Eaglekit and starts munching on catnip pies*

**Sparkle: ***cries* Why does everyone get pies but MEEEEEEEEEEEEE?

**Silverfreckle: **BECAUSE PIES ARE WHAT GIVE ME THE MAGICAL ABILITY TO FLY!

**Moonrain**: BECAUSE PIES ARE AWESOME!

**Sparkle: ***stare*

**Callie: **Ah, well, this is a confusing episode of my talk show, and I hope to see you next time!


	7. S1: E7 - Mousefur

**Season 1: Episode 7**

**Mousefur**

**Callie: **Welcome back! We had a rough ending last episode and Moonrain barely participated, so we're hoping for a better one this time!

**Eaglekit: **HIIIIIIIIIIIII!

**Callie: **Where is Silverfreckle? And Sparkle? And Moonrain?

**Sparkle**: *next to her* HIIIIIIIIIIIII!

**Callie: **Ugh *facepalm* Silverfreckle, tell them about our new host.

*cricket cricket*

**Callie: **SILVERFRECKLE!

**Sparkle **Okay, this has gotta be our last host! This makes FIVE!

**Callie: **Right! And as I promised in the first episode, the first three reviewers would be our hosts! But don't be discouraged folks! Please, please, PLEASE still review and I will include you on my show!

**Eaglekit**: Don't be silent!

**Sparkle: ***starts banging on drums* Be LOUUUUUUUUUUUUUUD!

**Callie/Silverfreckle/Eaglekit: ***plugs ears*

**Callie: **Okay, okay, okay, that's enough! *tosses drum into the crowd and it lands on Poppyfrost's head*

**Poppyfrost: **AUGH!

**Sparkle: **Okay, well, welcome to the show and let's get this party started? Who are we interviewing?

**Callie: ***looks at script* Strangely... we're doing a minor character.

**Eaglekit: **And who is that?

**Callie: **Mousefur.

**Everyone: ***shudder as Mousefur walks in, hunched over with a cane*

**Mousefur: ***snaps* WHAT DO YOU WANT?

**Callie: **Hello, Mousefur!

**Mousefur: ***grunt*

**Callie: **We're going to interview you now, and Moonrain will do the honors!

**Mousefur: ***sarcastically* Joy.

**Moonrain: **Hello, Mousefur! Is there anything special you would like to talk about?

**Mousefur: **NO.

**Eaglekit: ***stare*

**Moonrain: **Okay then! I'll think up some topics then.

**Callie: ***whispers* Did she eat pie?

**Silverfreckle**: I only gave her one of my catnip ones.

**Callie: ***facepalm*

**Moonrain: **So, Mousefur, did you ever find a mate in your life?

**Mousefur: **No.

**Eaglekit: ***stare*

**Moonrain: **Wow! That's why you were always a grouch!

**Mousefur**: D:

**Eaglekit: ***stare*****

**Moonrain**: Heh heh heh anyway – did you ever have kits?

**Mousefur: **If I never had a mate how would I have kits?

**Moonrain: **Good question. But you're not interviewing you, I am. Do you like dogs?

**Mousefur**: I don't like anyone!

**Moonrain: **Wow! That's pretty sad. Did you ever smile, even once?

**Mousefur: **Am I getting paid for this?

**Moonrain: **Sure! Now, um, answer the question**.**

**Mousefur: **How much?

**Callie: ***gripping a large stick* We're not going to have a Mousefur in a few minutes if you don't answer the questions.

**Mousefur: ***mimicking*

**Callie: ***THWACK*

**Mousefur: **Oi.

**Eaglekit: ***stare*

**Moonrain: **Ever?

**Mousefur: **NO I'VE NEVER SMILED–

**Sparkle: **That's pretty easy to believe!

**Mousefur: ***growling*

**Eaglekit: ***stare*

**Callie: ***eyes bulging, breathes out crazily and heavily* Okay, Mousefur. I think that's enough for today. Get off the show.

**Mousefur: **WHERE'S MY MONEY? Hand over the loot.

**Eaglekit: ***stare*

**Sparkle: ***chirps gleefully* Hey! You talk like a pirate!

**Callie: **Um... Moonrain? *whispers* You don't have any cash on you, do you?

**Moonrain: **O_- SHUSH! Maybe she won't notice! *pulls out wallet*

**Mousefur: **HAND IT OVER!

**Moonrain: ***grabs 100 mousetails and shoves them at Mousefur* Thank you for shopping at Wal-Mart and I hope you had a good day! *throws out window* Whew!

**Callie: **Well! That was...interesting. Anyway, that's the end of our episode and thanks for watching!

**Eaglekit: ***stare, then finally, looking at the broken window where Mousefur disappeared, loudly* I like HER!

**Jayfeather: **YOU TOOK MY STICK!

*chaos*

**Callie: **Ughhh.

_**A/N: This is one of my favorite episodes. I love Mousefur's lines!**_


	8. S1: E8 - Pumpkinfur's Family

_**A/N: I believe these were our FIRST OCs sent in by an anonymous reviewer: Pumpkinfur! THANK YOU PUMPKINFUR! (:**_

**Season 1: Episode 8**

**Pumpkinfur's Family**

**Callie: **Hello, Callie here with Eaglekit, Sparkle, Silverfreckle and Moonrain – YADDA YADDA YADDA LET'S GET ON WITH IT!

**Eaglekit: **FINALLY!

**Callie: **Hush, Eaglekit. Today we have – wait a minute. *looks at script* We have a family! Oh crud, a whole family is coming on here. That means:

8 x Randomness = Callie going from deranged to deranged level 2!

**Silverfreckle: **Oh we can't let that happen, can we? Okay, Pumpkinfur, come on out!

*a giant orange tom with white paws pads onto stage, followed by a soft cream she-cat, a gray tabby she-cat, a light brown tabby she-cat, a pale gray tom, and two kits*

**Callie: **Well, erm, hello! Nice to meet you...?

**Silverfreckle**: *floats down munching on a lemon meringue pie* Okay, so this is Pumpkinfur.

**Pumpkinfur: ***waves*

**Silverfreckle: **The cream she-cat is Roseleaf, his mate, and his kits are Cinderash and Runningbrook. Runningbrook's mate is Creeksplash and their kits are Falconkit, Hawkkit and–

**Eaglekit: **And MEEEEE!

**Everyone: **O_O?

**Eaglekit: ***hugs Runningbrook* HI MOM!

**Runningbrook: **Hello, dear. *starts grooming Eaglekit's ears* What am I going to do with you? Just because you started being a host on a talk show, that doesn't mean you don't take care of yourself!

**Eaglekit: **MOOOOOOOOM! *turns to Callie* Send her off the show, PLEASE!

**Callie: ***deep breath* The show... *breathes out* must go on...

**Eaglekit: ***puts a bag over her head*

**Runningbrook: **Oh stop being so modest, Eaglekit! Show your cute wittle chubby cheeks to the world!

**Eaglekit: ***pulls bag more firmly around chin and turns red through the bag*

**Sparkle: **She has chubby cheeks too? O_O

**Eaglekit: ***runs off the stage bawling*

**Roseleaf: **Awkward.

**Callie: ***long, drawn-out sigh* Okay, people. Let's get this over with.

**Sparkle: ***drools* Birrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrdyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy...

**Silverfreckle: ***ignoring Sparkle* Okay, peoples. *flies over to Pumpkinfur* I'm Silverfreckle and I want to ask you–

**Hawkkit/Falconkit: **OOOH! PIE! *start running crazily in all directions*

**Runningbrook: ***stare*

**Moonrain: **Well, are you going to do anything about it?

**Runningbrook: ***stare*

**Cinderash: **Everyone in this whole entire family ate a catnip pie, so we're not acting the way we should.

**Callie: **WHY IS IT ALWAYS THE CATNIP?

**Sparkle: **WHERE'S EAGLEKIT?

**Silverfreckle: **WHERE IS MY CATNIP PIE?

**Moonrain: **AHHH! WHO IS GOING TO DO THE INTERVIEW?

**Eaglekit: ***whimpers from offstage*

**Hawkkit/Falconkit: ***still running around*

**Roseleaf: ***passes out on stage*

**Cinderash: ***buries her face in a catnip pie* MMMM!

**Callie: ***is looking overwhelmed at this point and stares at the camera helplessly*

**Runningbrook**: *stare, then starts giggling hysterically*

**Everyone but Pumpkinfur and Callie: ***giggles hysterically*

**Pumpkinfur: ***staring at his family* My family needs to lay off the catnip.

**Callie: **Mine, too.*pulls curtain back to reveal a bunch of kits bouncing off the walls and some adult cats doing the Hokey Pokey in Greek and singing Gangnam (did I spell that right?) Style all at the same time

*cricket cricket*

**Pumpkinfur: **Wellll...

**Callie: **This has been...

**Pumpkinfur: **Strange...

**A Random Cat in Audience: **YOU HAVE TO ASK THEM AT LEAST THREE QUESTIONS BEFORE THEY LEAVE.

**Callie: **WHO MADE YOU HOSTESS? *sighs and looks over her shoulder at Pumpkinfur's strange family and her mental-case hostesses* Fine. Pumpkinfur, what do you think of your family?

**Pumpkinfur: **'...'

**Callie: **Awesome... is your family messed up?

**Pumpkinfur: **YES!

**Callie: **No worries, so is mine; sorry, Mom. Pumpkinfur, do you like pie?

**Pumpkinfur: **Never really thought about it...

**Callie: **PACK UP PEOPLE BECAUSE I'M OUTTA HERE! *flashes away in a cloud of smoke*

**Everyone**: *suddenly stops giggling and croons* DovvvVVvvve...


	9. S1: E9 - Vixenclaw

_**A/N: iheartbadboys14 has changed her name to what is currently The Russian Vixen! THANK YOU VIXEN for your OC!**_

**Season 1: Episode 9**

**Vixenclaw**

**Callie: **Hi, welcome ba... *spaces off*

**Silverfreckle: ***floats down, munching on a pie* Callie? Callie! Okay, never mind. Today we interview an OC sent in by iheartbadboys14. Her name is Vixenclaw and *pulls out a piece of paper and reads* She has a smooth, foxy-red pelt, blue eyes, and is from RandomnessClan, and oh, crud.

**Moonrain: **What?

**Silverfreckle: **SHE'S MAGIC!

**Moonrain: **This will be a disastrous day.

**Callie: **Great, another deranged ca... *spaces off*

**Sparkle: **HI :D *bounces up and down* WHO ARE WE INTERVIEWING?

**Silverfreckle: **COME ON OUT, VIXENCLAW!

**Callie: **Oh grea... *spaces off*

**Vixenclaw: **HIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII!

**Moonrain: **Where in the WORLD is Eaglekit?

**Silverfreckle: **Probably the zoo.

**Callie: **Wha... *spaces off*

**Moonrain: **She's probably just embarrassed and decided to take the day off. Sparkle, will you go check on her?

**Sparkle: **YESSSSSSSSSSSS! *runs away*

**Silverfreckle: **Sooooo, Vixenclaw, what's your favorite hobby?

**Vixenclaw: **Eating giant panda-bear shaped pizza rolls from South Korea.

**Moonrain/Silverfreckle: **?

**Callie: **?... *spaces off and starts giggling hysterically*

**Silverfreckle: **I think she finally caught the randomness.

**Moonrain: ***pushes behind curtain* Yeah...

**Vixenclaw**: MOOOOOOOOOOOOO! STILL HERE!

**Sparkle: ***walks in dragging Eaglekit, still with a bag over her head*

**Eaglekit: **My family is deranged!

**Moonrain: **Everyone's deranged! Vixenclaw, do you like being a member of RandomnessClan?

**Vixenclaw: **YES! Especially when they all start having staring contests with poptarts and take no notice of the moon talking about pizza!

**Silverfreckle: ***gags on her pie*

**Moonrain: **Do you like pie, Vixenclaw?

**Vixenclaw: **YES! :D

**Moonrain: **Do you WANT a pie?

**Vixenclaw: **YES! XD

**Silverfreckle: ***throws pie at Vixenclaw, but she ducks and it splatters all over Callie behind the curtain*

**Callie: ***giggling hysterically* Dovvvvvvvvvvvve... *points to a dove in the audience, sitting on Redtail's head*

**Redtail: **HOLY!

**Vixenclaw: ***giggling hysterically and running away* You'll neva catch meeeee!

**Silverfreckle**: I don't think I want to. Whew, she's random**.**

**Moonrain: **No pies were harmed in the making of this episode.

**Eaglekit: ***cries*

**Callie: **:D SEE YA NEXT TIME MWAHAHAHAAAA!


	10. S1: E10 - Fireleaf

**Season 1: Episode 10**

**Fireleaf**

**Eaglekit: **Hi and welcome to the show! To let you know, Callie is healthy and normal once again!

**Sparkle: ***gasp* YOU SAID THE WORD!

**Eaglekit: **Sparkle, sometimes I think you're mentally challenged.

**Sparkle: **I AM!

**Eaglekit: ***blink* Anyway, we have an OC guest from our faithful reviewer, Moonbeam141, who has also given us our dear friend Silverfreckle.

**Silverfreckle: ***waves*

**Callie: **That's right. Our new guest is Fireleaf, who can fly. She is white with yellow, orange and red leaf-shaped splotches and amber-green eyes.

**Fireleaf: ***flies in*

**Silverfreckle: **FIRELEAF! *tackles in a giant hug*

**Fireleaf: **WOAH! LADY! COOL IT! *struggles out of Silverfreckle's iron grip*

**Silverfreckle: **So, Fireleaf. I WANNA INTERVIEW YOU!

**Fireleaf: **:D

**Moonrain: **Oh boy.

**Silverfreckle: **Do you like broccoli?

**Everyone: **?

**Fireleaf: **NO!

**Silverfreckle: **Will you dress up as a teddy bear for Halloween?

**Everyone: **!

**Fireleaf: **NO!

**Silverfreckle: **Would you like a pet unicorn?

**Everyone**: ?!

**Fireleaf**: YES!

**Silverfreckle: **Would you name it Pink Sparkly Peanut Butter?

**Everyone**: ?!

**Fireleaf: **YES!

**Silverfreckle: **Do you want a pie?

**Everyone: **?!

**Fireleaf: **YES!

**Silverfreckle: **If the Easter bunny gave you the world's largest gumball would you eat it right away?

**Everyone: **?!

**Fireleaf: **NO!

**Silverfreckle: **If you had an invisible chocolate cat in your backyard named after a lily pad named Candi what would you name her?

**Everyone: **?!

**Fireleaf: **INVISICANDY!

**Everyone: **?!

**Moonrain/Callie:** *dies*

**Eaglekit:** *twitch* Well, if you're still alive...

**Fireleaf/Silverfreckle**: INVISI-CANDY! INVISI-CANDY! OH YEAH! OH YEAH! UH-HUH! UH-HUH!

**Eaglekit:** ?! BYE! *runsaway*

_**A/N: Awww, Eaglekit! Your sanity is so cute… *maniacal but dreamy laugh***_


	11. S1: E11 - Stickette

**Season 1: Episode 11**

**Stickette**

**Callie: **Hi! Today the segment will be very short and sweet because we're interviewing a cat that is not really a cat!

**Silverfreckle: ***floats down, munching on a peach pie* Then why did you call them a cat?

**Callie: ***shifty eyes* Stop talking, you!

**Moonrain: ***walks in with Eaglekit* I thought we weren't interviewing a cat today.

**Callie: **We're not.

**Sparkle: **Then why are we here?

**Callie: **We are interviewing... *drum roll* Stickette!

**Everyone: ***immediately starts protesting*

**Callie: **Because Stickette can't walk, Jayfeather will be joining us on the show today.

**Everyone: ***immediately starts protesting and screaming*

**Silverfreckle: **WE'RE INTERVIEWING A STICK?

**Moonrain: **IT'S NOT EVEN A SHE!

**Sparkle: **EVEN I'M SANER THAN THAT!

**Everyone: ***looks at her weirdly*

**Sparkle: **Okay, maybe not. But I still want to interview Stickette.

**Eaglekit: **THIS IS DIASTROUS!

**Silverfreckle: **WE'RE ALL GOING TO DIE!

**Callie: **Luckily with my magical typing fingers I can revive us all like I did to Moonrain and I last episode.

**Moonrain: **I LIIIIIIIIIIIIIIVE!

**Everyone: ***blink*

**Callie: **Okay. JAYFEATHER AND STICKETTE, PLEASE STEP ONTO STAGE!

**Jayfeather: ***looking crazed and carrying Stickette between his teeth, Jayfeather pads onto stage*

**Eaglekit: **Watch out for that pole over there. The last thing we need is a concussion onstage.

**Jayfeather: ***bang* OUCHIES!

**Sparkle: ***turns to Eaglekit* I thought he was blind, but I guess he's deaf, too.

**Eaglekit: ***sigh* I tried.

**Callie: **Don't bother. I tried warning him before. It didn't work. *to Jayfeather* Hi Jayfeather. Hi, Stickette.

**Jayfeather: **Say hi, Stickette!

**Stickette: **...

**Sparkle: ***flips hair/fur* Rude.

**Jayfeather: **You're boring her**.**

**Everyone**: 8O

**Jayfeather: **To death.

**Everyone**: D:

**Callie: **So, Stickette, how are you doing as a very bored person...uh, cat...uh, stick?

**Stickette: **...

**Callie: **Did you really admit to saying Jayfeather was super boring?

**Stickette: **...

**Jayfeather: **STICKETTE! HOW COULD YOU!

**Stickette: **...

**Moonrain: ***whispers* She's very shy.

**Callie: **Well, Stickette, thank you for your time. Even though you're not a she-cat, please do not have mountains and mountains of kits. 8)

**Jayfeather/Stickette: **WHAAT?

**Everyone: ***screams* STICKETTE TALKED!

**Callie/Sparkle/Eaglekit/Moonrain/Silverfreckle: **Oi. *dies*

_**A/N: I'm not a Jayfeather hater, but I like to see him get mad, so I torture him with the prospect of having Stickette for a mate. Plus, she sounds like Smurfette, and who can beat that?**_

_**Jayfeather (The REAL Jayfeather): You idiot!**_


	12. S1: E12 - Tigerstar --- Oops, Frank!

**Season 1: Episode 12**

**Tigerstar…Oops, Frank.**

**Callie: **Welcome, welcome, welcome back to the twelfth...twelfth? Episode of Callie's Warrior Cat Talk Show! Today we receive our last and final co-hostess and interview the Great Tigerstar!

**Silverfreckle: ***floats down munching on a key lime pie* We're interviewing Tigerstar? Oh, this will be an adventure.

**Eaglekit: **I know, right?

**Moonrain: **Hey, has anyone seen Sparkle?

**Callie: ***shrugs* I doubt she knows there's a show today. She's watching her little brother today; he's a purple baboon so he requires a lot of attention.

**Everyone: **:O

**Callie: **Anyway *picks up a stack of papers and crams it in Eaglekit's arms* Here, read this.

**Eaglekit: ***looking a little overwhelmed* Our last hostess is Flamekit, who is my age, and is medium orange with dark swirls on her tail, ears, and belly *turns page* and face, three white dots under one eye; bright blue eyes. She's from SunClan, also known as WaffleClan *turns page* and Callie's her role model.

**Callie: **Awww!

**Eaglekit: **SHHH! *continuing* She likes pie and everyone on the show. *chucks index cards over shoulder* Great.

**Swiftleaf: **Great. Another pie freak.

**Eaglekit: ***whacks with index cards* BE NICE!

**Swiftleaf**: I'M not the one who slaps people with index cards!

**Both: ***glare*

**Callie: **Girls, girls, don't fight. *pushes her way between them* Make way for Flamekit!

**Flamekit: ***trots onto stage, looking super excited, but not crazy excited*

**Sparkle: ***bursts in gripping a stack of index cards between her teeth, fur bushed out* Callie! Callie! *screams, spraying cards everywhere* We have a new co-host! It's actually a boy!

**Callie: ***flattens her ears* Sparkle, I already told you we have enough co-hostesses as it is.

**Sparkle: **We MUST make an exception.

**Callie: **WHAT IS SO SPECIAL ABOUT THIS CAT?

**Sparkle: **He's not a cat!

**Eaglekit: ***passes out*

**Moonrain: **EAGLEKIT!

**Callie: **WHAT IS HE THEN?

**Sparkle: ***pulls out a banana* This is Frank.

**Callie: ***facepalm* Ugh, Sparkle. I EAT bananas. No way we are having a BANANA on my show as a co-host.

**Sparkle: ***gasp* FRANK IS OFFENDED! *takes a permanent marker and draws a frowny face on the banana*

**Swiftleaf: **You know, the pie freak might not be so bad compared to this**.**

**Callie: ***looks at Silverfreckle* Silverfreckle, have you ever had a banana pie?

**Silverfreckle: ***finishes off an pear pie* Not that I remember. But I never had a pear pie either.

**Flamekit: **Um... *pokes Callie* Do you mean we're going to turn Frank into a pie?

**Sparkle: ***screams at the mere thought* NOOOO, FRANKY! THEY'LL NEVER CATCH US ALIVE! *runs away and jumps out a window, still gripping her banana and index cards*

**Swiftleaf: **I'd hate to know how you met her.

**Callie: **It was when we were little kids. I had to unwind her from the tetherball pole because the teacher was too afraid to.

**Everyone: ***twitchy thing goin' on with their eyes*

**Sparkle: ***comes back* WE MUST INTERVIEW FRANK!

**Callie: **WHY? I already told everyone we're interviewing Tigerstar. I can't go back on my word!

**Sparkle: **BUT FRANK'S FEELINGS WILL BE HURT!

**Flamekit: **Since when does Callie care about a banana's feelings? *smiles admiringly at Callie*

**Sparkle/Frank: ***start bawling*

**Callie: ***rolls her eyes* The only way to stop her from crying hysterically or grinning hysterically is to poke her with a rake and I really don't want to deal with Angry Sparkle right now.

**Eaglekit: ***nearly dies laughing* ANGRY SPARKLE?

**Sparkle: ***brushes away tear* Does that mean we're interviewing Frank?

**Callie: ***rolls her eyes* Yes. Swiftleaf, tell one of the toms to send a message to Tigerstar. He's not coming.

At the same time, very far away…

**?: **YESSSSSSSSSS!

Back at the studio…

**Callie: **Well, hello, Frank.

**Sparkle: **FRANK SAYS HI!

**Callie: **How did you come to realize you were a banana?

**Sparkle: **FRANK SAYS HE LOOKED IN THE MIRROR!

**Callie: **Do you like being a banana?

**Sparkle: **FRANK SAYS HE LIKES BEING A BANANA!

**Callie: **Has anyone ever threatened to eat you, Frank?

**Sparkle: **FRANK SAYS YES!

**Callie: **-_- Happy, Sparkle? I interviewed Frank.

**Silverfreckle: **Tigerstar's not coming. We have to close.

**Sparkle: **FRANK SAYS OH NO!

**Moonrain:** Sparkle, could you put that banana down for one measly minute?

**Sparkle: **FRANK IS OFFENDED!

**Callie: **JUST GET TIGERSTAR ON HERE!

**Sparkle: ***grabs Frank and hides on the ceiling*

**Eaglekit: **SPARKLE! FRANK! GET DOWN FROM THERE!

**Callie: **YOU'RE GOING TO FALL!

**Sparkle: **NO I WON'T!

*the ceiling comes crashing down*

**Callie**: *amidst all the rubble* Why did I ever agree to this? -_-

_**A/N: My longest chapter ever! :D Three and a half 8/11 pages (I always write with big pages XD) :D**_


	13. S1: E13 - TigerstarFor Real

**Season 1: Episode 13**

**Tigerstar…For Real (:**

**Moonrain: **Welcome back to the show! Sparkle was temporarily disqualified from the show and Callie fractured her nose when the ceiling fell down, so they're both gone today.

**Flamekit: **What about the banana?

**Silverfreckle: ***floats down munching on a banana pie* OH, what? *pulls out ear phones*

**Swiftleaf: **There's your answer; she just ate Frank.

**Eaglekit: **Well, we'd better get started. It's going to be a bumpy ride with Tigerstar being our guest.

**Flamekit: **If Callie were here, she'd say something like, "Why do I have such cruddy luck on my show?"

**Moonrain: **You know her that well, huh?

**Flamekit: ***nods proudly*

**Moonrain: **Well, anyway. TIGERSTARRRRRR! Get out here!

**Tigerstar: ***storms his way onto stage* WHERE'S MY MONEY?

**Silverfreckle: **We give it to you at the end of the show. *stops eating pie*

**Tigerstar: ***growls* It'd better be worth my time.

**Flamekit: **Can I ask the questions? Callie gave me a list.

**Moonrain: ***whispers to Silverfreckle* She's just insane! Callie's her role model? That cat's deranged!

**Silverfreckle: ***earns a glare from Flamekit* SHHHH!

**Flamekit: ***clears throat* Okay, Tigerstar. You know your big plan to take over the world epicly failed?

**Tigerstar: ***growls* Who are you to challenge the Great Tigerstar, kit?

**Flamekit: **I'm Callie's friend and you know she crushed Scourge under a giant pillow.

**Eaglekit: **She wasn't even around when that happened!

**Swiftleaf: **I guess that's how much she looks up to Callie. Seriously, ew.

**Silverfreckle: ***twitch*

**Flamekit: **Would you like to tell us about the rumors about you and Leopardstar?

**Tigerstar: **WHAT? *roars* YOU IDIOTS! TELLING LIES ABOUT ME AND THAT STUCK-UP OLD GRANNY FROM RIVERCLAN!

**Swiftleaf: ***shrugs* He's got a point.

**Tigerstar: ***unsheathes claws* You'll pay for this, kit!

**Silverfreckle: **Now hold on a second. You're like, sixty years old. You can't fight.

**Tigerstar: **SO NOT TRUE! I'm only fifty-nine.

**Eaglekit: **Oh, big whoop.

**Moonrain: **Flamekit, just ask him the rest of the questions so we can get the half-kittypet idiot off our show.

**Flamekit: **Tigerstar, have you ever ran into anything in the Dark Forest?

**Tigerstar: ***snarls* No.

**Moonrain: **LIAR.

**Tigerstar: **What?

**Moonrain: ***high-fives Silverfreckle*

**Flamekit: **Last question, Tigerstar. Do you like pie?

**Tigerstar: **Thank God. NO I DON'T LIKE PIE!

**Silverfreckle: ***shoves pie in face* Here's your payment! Bye, Tigerstar! *throws out window* Whew! See ya next time! Hopefully we'll have a nicer guest.

_**A/N: What a grump! Well, at least it's not a banana…. XD**_


	14. S1: E14 - Roseheart

_**A/N: I have been killing myself over who submitted Roseheart! AARRGH! If anyone remembers or if YOU were the one who submitted her, just flash me a PM! UGH, why is this so hard to remember?**_

**Season 1: Episode 14**

**Roseheart**

**Callie: ***looking angry in a very uncomfortable dress* Hello welcome back to the show we hope you enjoy the next episode. *mutters* Dumb dress...

**Swiftleaf: **We're interviewing an OC named Roseheart, who is also crazier than Sparkle.

**Eaglekit: **This'll be so much fun!

**Callie: ***annoyed, ready to explode* Focus, people. I want to get out of here as soon as possible. *mutters* And out of this dress.

**Moonrain: **If you say so. ROSEHEARRRRRRT!

**Roseheart: ***skips onto stage, grinning like the Cheshire cat*

**Silverfreckle: ***floats down, munching on a key lime pie* Oh, no. Is she a new co-hostess?

**Flamekit: **Callie says she's backup for when one of us is sick, or when one needs untangled on the tetherball pole. *shifty eyes toward Sparkle, who is yodeling*

**Moonrain: ***eyeing Roseheart warily* What I want to know is why she's wearing a dress like Callie.

**Callie: ***tugs on sleeves* At least hers doesn't make her look like her closet threw up all over her.

**Roseheart: ** 8D

**Silverfreckle: **Ehhhh... I'd better put this pie away. Heh. Heh, heh.

**Roseheart: **8D

**Swiftleaf: **Is she okay?

**Callie: **Who cares? Just ask her the first question.

**Swiftleaf**: *shrugs* Okay. Um...sooooo, Roseheart, would you like to tell us why you're wearing a dress?

**Roseheart: **My grandma made it for me 8D

**Sparkle: **I didn't know people made clothes. I thought they came from elves. You know, like cookies.

**Everyone: **'...'

**Swiftleaf: **Anyway, Roseheart, do you like being on talk shows? Is this your first experience as a back-up hostess?

**Roseheart: **YES and YES! 8D

**Callie: ***pacing, facepalm*

**Silverfreckle: ***whispers in Eaglekit's ear* This can't end well.

**Swiftleaf: **Okay, Roseheart. Next question – when you're the interviewer when one of us is absent, are you going to wear a dress?

**Callie: ***muttering* Unnatural for cats to wear dresses...don't know why I ever agreed to this...

**Roseheart: **Dunno, depends on whether I feel like bouncing off the walls. OOH, CHOCOLATE! *spaces off and gets distracted by a huge chocolate fountain on the other side of the stage*

**Flamekit: **:O How did that get there?

**Eaglekit: ***runs like a zombie toward the chocolate fountain* MYYYYYYYY CHOCOLATTTTTTTE!

**Everyone but Roseheart/Eaglekit: ***facepalm*

**Sparkle: ***jumps on Eaglekit's head, knocking her down, and tackles Roseheart, before jumping into the chocolate fountain*

*rumbling*

**Everyone: ***scream* AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

*explosion of chocolate pours out of the fountain and coats everyone in a thick sweet mess*

**Sparkle/Eaglekit/Roseheart: **YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY!

**Everyone Else: **EWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!

**Callie: ***strips off chocolate covered dress and burns it* YES! I CAN BREATHE AGAIN!

**Everyone**: *blink*

**Callie: ***realizes what the chocolate mess has done and looks ready to cry* WHY IS MY LIFE/SHOW SUCH A FAILURE!

**Silverfreckle: ***dips remaining pieces of the pie in chocolate* Mmmmmmmmm...

**Everyone: **O_-

**Silverfreckle: ***scrambles to her feet* Oh, crud. Did I just ruin a very tragic and emotional moment?

**Everyone: **Uh-huh.

**Silverfreckle: ***dips pie in chocolate again* I'm SO not sorry! This pie is SO good in chocolate! We need chocolate explosions more often!

**Sparkle: **In that case... *jumps in chocolate fountain again*

**Everyone: **OH CRUD!

*there is a lot of rumbling and shaking before chocolate spatters over everything again*

**Flamekit: ***is now wearing a dress identical to the one Callie burned and starts muttering about it* SO UNNATURAL FOR CATS TO WEAR DRESSES! *strips hers off also and burns it*

**Roseheart**: *dumps a whole package of Mentos into Coca Cola* COKE EXPLOSION!

*there is a lot of fizzing and sizzling before the Coca Cola explodes*

**Moonrain: **Three explosions in one day?

**Sparkle: **I can jump in the chocolate fountain again if you want to make it four.

**Everyone: **NO!

**Silverfreckle: **I thought this used to be a talk show.

**Callie: **Right, now it's just a mess-up show.

**Eaglekit: ***cracks up for no apparent reason*

**Swiftleaf: **Well, we'd better close the show for a week to clean this place up.

**Sparkle: **Can I jump in the chocolate fountain again?

**Everyone: **NO!

**Sparkle: **Too late! *smashes into the chocolate fountain*

*the chocolate fountain plugs up and the rest of the chocolate goes flying everywhere*

**Eaglekit: **Where did that chocolate fountain come from anyway?


	15. S1: E15 - Wildcall - SEASON FINALE -

_**A/N: I didn't make any changes to the talk show except for grammar mistakes, so there will be no week long break! I can't stay away from you guys for that long, anyway!**_

**Season 1: Episode 15 – SEASON FINALE**

**Wildcall**

**Callie: ***is standing onstage (looking happy in the studio, for once) in a sea of confetti* HELLO! *grins* This is the season finale and the thousand million hostesses get a week-long break!

**Sparkle: ***rolls eyes* That's just her excuse for working more on her other stories than this one.

**Callie: ***glare* Stop talking, you!

**Swiftleaf: **Um, we just wasted like, five whole minutes of the show. Can we get going, PLEASE?

**Flamekit: **GIVE THE AUTHOR HER TIME!

**Eaglekit: **Okay, since no one is talking, I will take over. Silverfreckle, go.

**Silverfreckle: **Today we are interviewing... *gulps and is still*

**Moonrain: **Who is it? *peeks over Silverfreckle's shoulder*

**Silverfreckle: **Does my fur look okay?

**Moonrain: **Um...yeah, it looks fine. Why?

**Silverfreckle:** ...

**Sparkle: **THIS IS A TALK SHOW, PEOPLE!

**Moonrain: **Okay, today we're interviewing Wildcall, a tawny-and-calico tom with red ear-tips, blue-gray tail-tip, and sky-blue eyes.

**Silverfreckle: ***is taking deep breaths* Is he here yet?

**Moonrain**: No, why?

**Silverfreckle: ***whispers so only Moonrain can hear her* I like him.

**Moonrain: **:0

**Sparkle: **WHATS GOIN' ON?

**Moonrain: ***doesn't realize Sparkle is even there* YOU LIKE FIRELEAF'S TWIN–

**Silverfreckle: ***tackles* SHHHHH!

**Moonrain: **Oh, sorry. *tries to keep a straight face as Wildcall walks on*

**Callie: ***comes over to Moonrain and Silverfreckle, spraying confetti everywhere and mutters* I know I'm going to slip on this stuff before the end of the day.

**Silverfreckle: ***is literally shaking in her fur*

**Moonrain: ***lowers her voice* Silverfreckle, chill! Play it cool. I'll help you out.

**Silverfreckle: ***nods, weak, scared smile*

**Wildcall: ***walks onstage, looking around* I'm on the season finale? *blinks*

**Moonrain: **You sure are! ALL of the HOSTESSES WELCOME you to the SHOW. *speaks a little too loudly*

**Flamekit/Eaglekit/Swiftleaf/Sparkle/Callie: ***looking a bit baffled and pretty much speechless*

**Wildcall: ***suddenly sees Silverfreckle, who is looking very alarmed* SILVERFRECKLE? *nearly screeches* YOU'RE a hostess?

**Silverfreckle: ***manages a nod*

**Moonrain: **THAT'S RIGHT! *still talking wayyyy too loud* SILVERFRECKLE and I are going to INTERVIEW you, WILDCALL. Isn't that RIGHT, SILVERFRECKLE?

**Silverfreckle: ***nods, looking overwhelmed*

**Everyone but Moonrain/Silverfreckle: **?

**Wildcall: **Oookay, then... *looks at Silverfreckle and starts turning red*

**Flamekit/Eaglekit/Sparkle/Swiftleaf/Callie:** ?

**Moonrain:** SO, Wildcall! *glances at Silverfreckle out of the corner of her eye* WHO do YOU LIKE?

**Wildcall: ***turns bright red and risks a tiny glance at Silverfreckle*

**Moonrain**: *grins wildly and flashes a glance at Silverfreckle* Do YOU have a mate YET, WILDCALL?

**Wildcall: ***still bright red to his fur-tips* Um...no.

**Moonrain: ***glares* ARE YOU SURE ABOUT THAT?

**Fireleaf: ***from somewhere in the audience* IT'S TRUE! I'M HIS TWIN SISTER AND I KNOW!

**Moonrain: ***relaxes* Well, SILVERFRECKLE says SHE wants to FINISH up THE INTERVIEW. *while she speaks, she goes over to the other hostesses and starts pushing them out the door* We'll LEAVE you TWO to it.

**Silverfreckle: ***blushing, gulps*

**Wildcall: **Nice day we're having, isn't it?

**Silverfreckle: ***gulps even harder* Uh-huh!

**Wildcall: ***looks sympathetic* New to the talk show and the stage?

**Silverfreckle: ***shakes head* Uh-uh.

**Wildcall: **Oh.

*awkward silence, cricket*

**Wildcall:** Neverthought I'd be on the show for the season finale, you?

**Silverfreckle: **I didn't think I'd last until this episode. All the hosts are CRAZY!

**Swiftleaf: ***from on the other side of the wall* PIE FREAKS!

**Wildcall: **I've seen the show before. It must be tough, trying to manage all these crazy cats.

**Silverfreckle: ***thinking, "He saw me eat all those pies? AHHH!"* It is, trust me.

**Wildcall: **If you want, I can help in case someone is absent every now and then.

**Silverfreckle: ***nearly screams* YES!

**Wildcall: ***looking satisfied and a bit surprised*

**Moonrain: ***doing a happy dance from behind the curtain*

**Callie: ***looks ready to explode* I told everyone six thousand times that we have enough co-hosts as it is!

**Sparkle: **Callie, just accept the fact that none of us ever listen to you. *pats head*

Back on the stage…

**Moonrain: ***comes out on stage* WELL, WILDCALL, good to KNOW that you'll be BACK SOON on the SHOW.

**Callie: **Hope you had a great season finale! I can't wait for next season!


	16. S2: E1 - Bluebell

**Season TWO (:D) : Episode ONE! (:D)**

**Bluebell**

**Callie: ***runs onto stage* HI AND WELCOME TO - WOAHHHHHH! *slips on leftover confetti and goes flying off the stage*

**Audience: ***steps back as Callie faceplants on the ground*

**Callie**: *pulls face up from the ground* You have got to be kidding me! *face is flat like in cartoons*

**Sparkle: **HIIIIIIII! I'M SPARKLE AND WE'RE HAVING A GUEST NAMED BLUEBELL TODAY!

**Silverfreckle: ***floats down munching on a peach cobbler* Uh, who?

**Swiftleaf: **Bluebell. *reads from an intimidating stack of papers* She's a blue-gray she-cat with little fake gold bell earrings that go jingle-jangle when she walks. *looks up in horror* WHAAAAAAAAAAAT?

**Eaglekit: ***jumping around Swiftleaf* WHAT? WHAT IS IT? TELLLL USSSS!

**Swiftleaf: ***jams papers in face* SHE'S NOT A PIE FREAK YAYYYYYYYYYY!

**Everyone: **Ooookey...

**Callie: ***climbs back up on stage, breathless* Uh... *looks at audience*

**Audience: ***stare*

**Callie: **WELL.

**Audience: ***stare*

**Callie: **This has been...awkward. So far.

**Silverfreckle: ***whacks upside the head with the half-empty cobbler tin*

**Callie**: I thought you hated cobbler. O_O

**Silverfreckle: ***takes another bite* I do.

**Callie: **Never mind. BLUEBELL!?

**Flamekit: ***mimicking and grinning wildly* BLUEBELL!?

**Bluebell: ***trots onto stage*

**Bluebell's Earrings: ***jingle-jangle, jingle-jangle, jingle-jangle*

**Sparkle: **HIII! :D :D :D :D :D :D :D

**Bluebell: **:O?

**Moonrain: ***pushes Sparkle away* Hi, Bluebell! How are you liking the show so far?

**Flamekit: **Uh, Moonrain? She just came on.

**Moonrain**: -_-

**Bluebell: **Nervous, actually. :|

**Swiftleaf: **Don't be! Our co-hostesses are USUALLY welcoming. And all those people who AREN'T pie freaks are USUALLY-

**Sparkle:** I'M NOT A PIE FREAK AND I'M NOT SANE!

**Bluebell: **? *watches all the co-hostesses get into a huge giant fight*

**Eaglekit: ***jumps out of the clouds of dust and smoke*

**Both: ***watches as a foot of one person, a head of another, and a tail of a third show just out of the dust and smoke*

**Eaglekit: **WELL.

**Bluebell: **This is awkward.

**Eaglekit: **I can interview you if you want.

**Bluebell**: Okay.

**Eaglekit: **So, how do you feel about being on the show?

**Bluebell: **...A little nervous.

**Eaglekit: **You're right to. *looks at the cloud of dust and cats* O_O *turns back to Bluebell* So what are your hobbies, Bluebell?

**Bluebell**: I likethe color orange, hot air balloons, my pet goats, and cake.

**Swiftleaf: **DARN! SHE'S NOT A PIE FREAK! SHE'S A CAKE FREAK!

**Both: **O.O

**Eaglekit: **Who are your biggest fans on the show?

**Bluebell:** Sparkle, Callie, and Silverfreckle.

**Silverfreckle: ***screams, realizing* I'M NOT EATING PIE! I'M EATING COBBLER! AHHHHHHHHHH! *screams head off and flies around screaming*

**Bluebell: **O.O!

**Callie: **I tried to tell her but GUESS WHO wouldn't listen.

**Bluebell: **O.O?

**Silverfreckle: ***throw cobbler out window and passes out*

**Bluebell:** O.O!?

**Co-Hostesses: ***all tied in knots as they fall over* HELLLLLP!

**Eaglekit: **Yeah, well. *sarcastically* This should be fun.


	17. S2: E2 - Darkstripe, Sparkle, Flamekit

**Season TWO (:D) : Episode ONE! (:D)**

**Bluebell**

**Callie: ***runs onto stage* HI AND WELCOME TO - WOAHHHHHH! *slips on leftover confetti and goes flying off the stage*

**Audience: ***steps back as Callie faceplants on the ground*

**Callie**: *pulls face up from the ground* You have got to be kidding me! *face is flat like in cartoons*

**Sparkle: **HIIIIIIII! I'M SPARKLE AND WE'RE HAVING A GUEST NAMED BLUEBELL TODAY!

**Silverfreckle: ***floats down munching on a peach cobbler* Uh, who?

**Swiftleaf: **Bluebell. *reads from an intimidating stack of papers* She's a blue-gray she-cat with little fake gold bell earrings that go jingle-jangle when she walks. *looks up in horror* WHAAAAAAAAAAAT?

**Eaglekit: ***jumping around Swiftleaf* WHAT? WHAT IS IT? TELLLL USSSS!

**Swiftleaf: ***jams papers in face* SHE'S NOT A PIE FREAK YAYYYYYYYYYY!

**Everyone: **Ooookey...

**Callie: ***climbs back up on stage, breathless* Uh... *looks at audience*

**Audience: ***stare*

**Callie: **WELL.

**Audience: ***stare*

**Callie: **This has been...awkward. So far.

**Silverfreckle: ***whacks upside the head with the half-empty cobbler tin*

**Callie**: I thought you hated cobbler. O_O

**Silverfreckle: ***takes another bite* I do.

**Callie: **Never mind. BLUEBELL!?

**Flamekit: ***mimicking and grinning wildly* BLUEBELL!?

**Bluebell: ***trots onto stage*

**Bluebell's Earrings: ***jingle-jangle, jingle-jangle, jingle-jangle*

**Sparkle: **HIII! :D :D :D :D :D :D :D

**Bluebell: **:O?

**Moonrain: ***pushes Sparkle away* Hi, Bluebell! How are you liking the show so far?

**Flamekit: **Uh, Moonrain? She just came on.

**Moonrain**: -_-

**Bluebell: **Nervous, actually. :|

**Swiftleaf: **Don't be! Our co-hostesses are USUALLY welcoming. And all those people who AREN'T pie freaks are USUALLY-

**Sparkle:** I'M NOT A PIE FREAK AND I'M NOT SANE!

**Bluebell: **? *watches all the co-hostesses get into a huge giant fight*

**Eaglekit: ***jumps out of the clouds of dust and smoke*

**Both: ***watches as a foot of one person, a head of another, and a tail of a third show just out of the dust and smoke*

**Eaglekit: **WELL.

**Bluebell: **This is awkward.

**Eaglekit: **I can interview you if you want.

**Bluebell**: Okay.

**Eaglekit: **So, how do you feel about being on the show?

**Bluebell: **...A little nervous.

**Eaglekit: **You're right to. *looks at the cloud of dust and cats* O_O *turns back to Bluebell* So what are your hobbies, Bluebell?

**Bluebell**: I likethe color orange, hot air balloons, my pet goats, and cake.

**Swiftleaf: **DARN! SHE'S NOT A PIE FREAK! SHE'S A CAKE FREAK!

**Both: **O.O

**Eaglekit: **Who are your biggest fans on the show?

**Bluebell:** Sparkle, Callie, and Silverfreckle.

**Silverfreckle: ***screams, realizing* I'M NOT EATING PIE! I'M EATING COBBLER! AHHHHHHHHHH! *screams head off and flies around screaming*

**Bluebell: **O.O!

**Callie: **I tried to tell her but GUESS WHO wouldn't listen.

**Bluebell: **O.O?

**Silverfreckle: ***throw cobbler out window and passes out*

**Bluebell:** O.O!?

**Co-Hostesses: ***all tied in knots as they fall over* HELLLLLP!

**Eaglekit: **Yeah, well. *sarcastically* This should be fun.


	18. S2: E3 - Wildcall, Bob & Joe

**Season 2: Episode 3**

**Wildcall, Bob and Joe**

**Sparkle: ***bursts in* YOU GUYS!

**Moonrain/Flamekit: ***are sitting at a table, playing cards and telling corny jokes* :O? *looks up* SPARKLE?

**Sparkle: ***curses:* CINNAMON! Where is everyone?

**Flamekit: ***ticks off reasons on paws* Callie's at the library getting more Warriors books to fill in on what she missed, Swiftleaf's cousin had a concussion, Eaglekit is having a family reunion, and Silverfreckle slept in late and is on her way. She might be here. Who knows.

**Moonrain: **So we're pretty much waiting until Silverfreckle gets here. How about you, Sparkle? Why are you late?

**Sparkle: **Traffic. *scratches head* Why are we waiting for Silverfreckle?

**Moonrain: **Her cru– *slaps paw over mouth* I mean...it's her turn to interview the guest star! :D

**Flamekit: ***confused* Why don't we just do it today and let her make up for it today?

**Voice: **I'M HERE!

**Sparkle: **Well, that's not Silverfreckle!

**Moonrain: ***having trouble keeping the secret in*

**Flamekit: ***rolls eyes* Seriously, Moonrain. And I thought of you as someone logical.

**Sparkle: **Well, you must be Wildcall, the cat who we interviewed on the Season Finale!

**Wildcall: **o.o Uh, yeah? And?

**Sparkle: **And so we must have a wild dance party celebrating your return!

**Everyone but Sparkle: :**O!

**Wildcall: **Well...um... *head shoots up* Where is Silverfreckle?

**Moonrain: ***falls over giggling and then buries her head in an imaginary hole in the stage to shut herself up*

**Everyone: **O_O?

**Flamekit: ***opens mouth to speak*

**Voice: **I...MADE...IT...!

**Silverfreckle: ***flies in and pulls out a giant apple pie and starts munching on it*

**Wildcall: ***swallows shyly*

**Moonrain: ***grabs at a basket of fruit and shoves it all in her mouth*

**Sparkle: **Ooh, grapefruit! *pulls a leftover fruit from the basket and starts chomping on it*

**Flamekit: **WELL then... *elbows Silverfreckle* WAKE UP!

**Silverfreckle: ***embarrassed* Uh, hi...Wildcall...

**Wildcall**: *trying to lighten the mood* Looks like a delicious pie.

**Silverfreckle: ***still realizes she's holding it* ! *grabs all pies (which are about six of them) and throws them over her shoulder, where they explode into a giant crusty, filling mess all over the stage*

**Flamekit: **If Callie were here, she'd jump on your head screaming and stop the show for you to clean up the mess.

**Moonrain**: *bursts out laughing* Good thing Callie's not here!

Somewhere far away…

**?: **I WILL GET YOU SOMEDAY, MOONRAIN! YOU CAN COUNT ON IT!

Back on the stage…

**Moonrain: ***gulp*

**Silverfreckle: **So, how do you like the show? *shy*

**Wildcall: **Very random. *seeing Silverfreckle's alarmed look* In a good way!

**Silverfreckle: ***looks at Moonrain for help*

**Moonrain: ***nearly bursting*

**Silverfreckle: **Well, Wildcall. Do you like pie?

Somewhere far away…

**?: **NO! NO MORE PIE FREAKS! I CAN'T STAND IT!

Back on the stage…

**Wildcall: **O.O At times...

**Silverfreckle: ***feeling very awkward and embarrassed*

**Moonrain: ***banging head on the stage floor*

BOOOM!

**Wildcall/Silverfreckle: **AHHHHHHHHH!

**Flamekit/Sparkle/Moonrain: **?

**Wildcall/Silverfreckle: **ITS BOB AND JOE!

**Wildcall: **GET THE KIT! SAVE THE OTHERS!

**Bob/Joe: ._.**

**Moonrain: ***pops up* Bob is a large brown tom with black stripes, and Joe is a thin gray tom with amber eyes.

**Bob: **Sup.

**Joe: **Yo.

**Both: ***arch backs, hissing, spitting, bushing tails out, run toward Wildcall and Silverfreckle*

**Wildcall/Silverfreckle: ***brace themselves*

**Bob/Joe: ***slip on the pie that Silverfreckle threw and go flying across the stage* AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

**Flamekit: ***light-bulb* WHY DON'T WE INTERVIEW BOB AND JOE!

**Wildcall/Silverfreckle: ***O_O o_o o_O O_o O.O o.o o.O O.o* !

**Moonrain: ***pulling on her own ears* I CAN'T TAKE IT ANYMORE! *goes over to a stunned Flamekit* Yes, Flamekit, that's a brilliant idea. *walks past Flamekit and goes over to Wildcall and Silverfreckle* But these two don't get along very well with the rogues, so THEY will be in the back room.

**Flamekit: ***scratches head*

**Silverfreckle: ***blush*

**Flamekit: **WELL. Sparkle?

**Sparkle: ***says through mouthful of a s'more* WHAT DO YOU WANT?

**Flamekit: **Well, do you want to help me interview Bob and Joe?

**Sparkle**: Do they like s'mores?

**Flamekit**: *pauses, then grins* Perfect question! Bob! Joe! Do you like s'mores?

**Bob/Joe: ***looking at her like 'LOL WUT?'* What's a s'more?

**Sparkle**: *gasps horrifically* YOU. DON'T. LIKE. S'MORES!? *dies*

**Flamekit: **WELL. Moonrain?

**Moonrain: ***grinning evilly and rubbing hands –cough- paws together* WHAT DO YOU WANT?

**Flamekit: **Well, do you want to help me interview Bob and Joe?

**Moonrain: **Do they like romance?

**Flamekit: ***pauses, then grins* Perfect question! Bob! Joe! Do you like romance?

**Bob/Joe: ***once again looking at her like 'LOL WUT?'* What's a romance?

**Moonrain: ***gasps horrifically* YOU. DON'T. LIKE. ROMANCE!? *dies*

**Flamekit: **O.O WELL.

**Bob/Joe: **…

**Flamekit: ***turns to cameras* WELL that wraps up our show. If you want to see a sneak peek of what happened in the back, PLEASE review and we will show it in the next chapter! Hopefully by then all our co-hostesses will all be back!


	19. S2: E4 - Mary-Suetail

**Season 2: Episode 4**

**Mary-Suetail**

**Flamekit/Eaglekit: ***bouncing a volleyball back and forth over the net*

**Flamekit: ***ball bounces on her head*

BANG!

**Flamekit:** !

**Callie: **Hello! Welcome back. I think... *confused*

**Moonrain: ***taps foot* I'm a girl.

**Sparkle: ***juggling hand puppets* And I'm a CREEPY WACKO! 8D

**Eaglekit: ***banging her face on the floor* My *bang* Family *bang* Is *bang* DERANGED!

**Callie: **I'm right there with you. NOW then –

**Silverfreckle: ***floats down eating a catnip pie* HEYYY. What's going on?

**Flamekit: **We're going to interview someone. *pulls out index cards and smacks face* Dung.

**Eaglekit: ***peers over shoulder* What? Who are we interviewing?

**Flamekit: **Her name is Mary-Suetail, so I don't think it's going to go very well.

**Callie: ***eye twitch*

**Mary-Suetail: ***bounds onto stage, grinning wickedly*

**Moonrain: **Where is Swiftleaf?

**Silverfreckle: **I do believe she's still with her cousin. You know, the one that had the concussion.

**Moonrain: **What happened anyway?

**Mary-Suetail: **:O Am I invisible again?

**Everyone: **O_O' Um, no, I don' think so.

**Sparkle: ***walks in and spikes the volleyball so it lands on Eaglekit, making her as flat as a pancake*

**Silverfreckle: **Ooh! I'm going to have to try pancake-flavored pies! :D *pulls out a pad of paper and writes it down*

**Callie: **O.O Well uh...Mary-Suetail.

**Mary-Suetail: **8D?

**Callie: **What are your hobbies?

**Mary-Suetail**: Pretending to be a turtle, flying downwards, chewing gum and making noodles.

**Callie: **'...'

**Sparkle: **Ooh, I like to fly downwards!

**Silverfreckle: **Uhhh... I think flying down is called falling.

**Sparkle: **Call it what you like, crazy cat. La-la-la-la-la-la-la! *skips away happily*

**Eaglekit: ***shifty eyes* So tell us what your favorite random word is, Mary-Suetail.

**Mary-Suetail: **Cumquat. OH, and Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious.

**Flamekit: ***smacks forehead* WELL, I don't' think that's a real word.

**Moonrain: **What are you, a dictionary?

**Eaglekit: **Maybe a thesaurus.

**Flamekit: **FINE THEN, Smarty-Pants. YOU can answer the questions!

**Moonrain: ***grabs her index cards* Hmm. *ponders over them, then chucks them over her shoulder and strides confidently to Mary-Suetail*

**Mary-Suetail: **8D?

**Moonrain: **8D!

**Mary-Suetail: **8D!

**Moonrain: **So, do you like pies?

**Sparkle: **We ask that question to EVERY guest!

**Everyone: **SHHHH!

**Mary-Suetail: ***in response is stealing all of Silverfreckle's pies*

Somewhere far away…

**?: **WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY? WHY WHY WHY ARE ALL OF THE GUESTS PIE FREAKS? WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!

Back on the stage…

**Callie:** I'm not a pie freak!

**?: **YESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!

**Moonrain: ***blink blink* Anyway!

**Eaglekit/Flamekit: ***still playing volleyball with Sparkle*

**Silverfreckle: **-.- Can I have my pies back now?

**Mary-Suetail: **NEVA! *runs away* YOU'LL NEVA CATCH ME! HEHEHE! *bang*

**Callie**: 8O

**Mary-Suetail: ***tangled in volleyball net* Why does this happen to me at the worst times? *sigh*

**Callie: **At least you're not surrounded by thousands of scary crazy cats stealing pies and making up long, infuriatingly random sentences.

**Sparkle: ***slurs* I like cream cheese and Moosies wants a candy cane... 8D

**Callie**: See?

**Mary-Suetail: ***struggles* HELLO! STILL HERE AND NEED UNSTUCK!

**Everyone: **:O

_**A/N: Since I'm having such a hard time remembering who submitted who, PM or review your name and what cat you submitted in the earlier chapters (and in the later chapters!) and I will give a big shout-out of thanks when I'm finished with this fic! Thanks (:**_


	20. S2: E5 - Bravetail

**Season 2: Episode 5**

**Bravetail**

**Callie: ***grinning evilly*

**Flamekit**: *grinning creepily*

**Eaglekit**: *grinning wickedly*

**Moonrain**: *grinning viciously*

**Swiftleaf: ***grinning maliciously*

**Silverfreckle: ***eating a lemon meringue pie LOUDLY*

**Everyone: ***glare menacingly*

**Silverfreckle: **Oh, what? Did I just ruin a very spectacular moment?

**Everyone**: *sigh*

**Callie: **Anyway, welcome to the Randomness Show of Random Randomness! :D

**Sparkle: ***walks in* HIIIIIIIIIII! So who are we interviewing?

**Callie: ***glare* No one, yet. DON'T INTERRUPT ME!

**Sparkle: ***cheerfully* Okay!

**Callie: ***eye twitch* First I'm going to answer something that Bravetail wanted to know.

**Bravetail: ***somewhere in the audience* :D?

**Callie: **Backup co-host! *kicks Sparkle off the stage* Okay, you're on!

**Bravetail: ***walks onto stage* But what about Sparkle?

**Callie: **O.O... She's on vacation.

**Sparkle: **I am? OH, okay! *picks up a random suitcase and trots away*

**Everyone: **8O

**Bravetail**: I mean where was Sparkle in Episode 10?

**Swiftleaf: ***mutters* Probably being a pie freak or doing some crazy thing like collecting pepper shakers.

**Everyone**: *looks at her strangely*

**Swiftleaf**: WHAT! It's something Sparkle would do, right?

**Everyone: **True. *shrugs*

**Callie: **That's when Sparkle met Frank. -.- Unfortunately.

**Bravetail: **SO, why aren't you accepting any more hosts for the show?

**Callie: ***shifty eyes* With trying to keep six involved, I keep forgetting us all, and just think if I accepted Bluebell, Wildcall, and you. Then I'd have NINE to keep track of. *faints at the thought*

**Eaglekit/Flamekit/Silverfreckle/Moonrain/Swiftleaf/Bravetail**: O_O

**Sparkle: ***comes back and pours a bucket of water on Callie's head*

**Callie: ***wakes up* SPARKLE I WILL GET YOU AHHHHHHHHHHHH!

**Bravetail: **I see. O.o WHAT is up with the PIES?

**Swiftleaf: ***starts bawling* NOT THE PIE FREAKS! WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!

**Silverfreckle: ***looks down at pie* 8O *throws pie into the audience*

**Thornclaw: ***screams like a girl as he gets meringue all over his face* MY DIGNITY! MY PRECIOUS DIGNITY!

**Callie: **Ummm... I think the pie thing started with Silverfreckle but it might have been Sparkle.

**Bravetail: **WHY WEREN'T EAGLEKIT AND FLAMEKIT SANE! D:

**Moonrain: ***nearly explodes* WHAT DO YOU MEAN WHY ISN'T EAGLEKIT SANE?

**Bravetail: **Exactly that. WHY. WEREN'T. THEY. SANE?!

**Moonrain: **Well, Flamekit's pretty sane unless you give her M&M's.

**Flamekit: ***eyes dilate* WHO SAID M&M'S? 8D

**Moonrain: **O_O' But Flamekit's role model is CALLIE. And Callie hates M&M's. Skittles are her thing. THAT'S INSANE!

**Callie: ***eating a slice of cherry pie* Mmmm, that's good. Wait, WHAT? SKITTLES? WHERE?

**Swiftleaf: ***sobs*

**Bravetail: **AND CALLIE!

**Callie: **AND WHATIE?

**Bravetail: **YOU HAVE TO GET FIRELEAF BACK ON HERE!

**Fireleaf: ***from the crowd* :D GLADLY!

**Callie: **WHY?

**Bravetail: **THE RANDOMNESS FROM THAT EPISODE MADE ME SCREAM WITH HAPPINESS!

**Callie: **AWESOME! ANY OTHER QUESTIONS BEFORE WE INTERVIEW TIGERSTAR?

**Bravetail: **YEAH! WAIT, YOU ALREADY INTERVIEWED TIGERSTAR!

**Callie: **UH-HUH BUT WE TOLD HIM HE WOULD HAVE TO IMPROVE HIS ATTITUDE OR WE'D BLOW HIM AWAY! *pulls out a bazooka*

**Flamekit: ***pulls out a miniature bazooka and stands by Callie* :D

**Silverfreckle: ***finishing the cherry pie that Callie had sliced*

**Swiftleaf: ***still crying, her tears making a puddle*

**Bravetail: **WOW! BLUEBELL, FIRELEAF, WILDCALL, AND TIGERSTAR SHOULD BE ON AGAIN!

**Callie: **OKAY! I'LL KEEP THAT IN MIND! :D

**Bravetail: **OKAY I'M DONE.

**Callie: **WHY ARE WE YELLING?

**Swiftleaf: ***tears are making a river now*

**Bravetail: **I DON'T KNOW, WHY ARE YOU YELLING?

**Callie: **WELL YOU STARTED IT.

**Bravetail: **Oh.


	21. S2: E6 - Leaf

**Season 2: Episode 6**

**Leaf**

**Bluebell: **Welcome back! Sparkle and Moonrain are both not here today, so Bravetail and I are filling in for them! :D

**Eaglekit: **Sparkle's not here? :O

**Bluebell: **Erm, that's right.

**Eaglekit: **WHY NOT?

**Bluebell: **O_O

**Eaglekit: ***cries* She's the only exciting random one around here and–

**Callie/Flamekit/Bravetail: ***glares menacingly* o_-

**Eaglekit: **Heh heh *weak smile*

**Callie: **AAAANYWAY, today we're interviewing Leaf That Rides the Wind.

**Leaf: ***walks in shyly*

**Flamekit: **HI! :D *jumping up and down* WHAT DO YOU WANT TO TALK ABOUT?

**Leaf: **O_-

**Eaglekit: **Hi, Leaf, I'm Eaglekit. *introduces everyone* What would you like to be interviewed about?

**Leaf**: *shrugs*

**Bravetail: **Let's start about how you got here all the way from the mountains!

**Eaglekit: ***butts in before Leaf can say anything* WELL DUH! She's a LEAF that RIDES on the WIND! So OF COURSE SHE CAME HERE ON THE WIND! *looking pleased* :D

**Callie: ***facepalm* Why is my best friend so TERRIBLY MESSED UPPPPP? *adds to Swiftleaf and Eaglekit's tears that has made an ocean and is now flooding the whole stage*

**Leaf: **Well, actually, I flew here...in a plane?

**Bluebell**: O_O'

**Callie: **You a good swimmer, Leaf? Heh, heh.

**Leaf: **Um...yes?

**All: ***swimming*

**Sparkle: ***screams* I'M DROWNING I'M DROWNING HELP ME!

**All: **HELPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPP!


	22. S2: E7 - Leopardstar

**Season 2: Episode 7**

**Leopardstar**

**Voice: ***coughs* Hello?

**Sparkle: ***still swimming* WHO ARE YOU?

**Voice: **Leopardstar.

**Callie: ***also swimming* Can you help us?

**Leopardstar: **Stand up. ._.

*the cats stand up, water dripping off, yet Eaglekit and Flamekit are nowhere to be seen*

**Callie: ***worriedly* Where are Eaglekit and Flamekit?

**Silverfreckle: ***flies in with Eaglekit and Flamekit on her back, eating ice cream* They're right here.

**Bluebell: **O.O?

**Callie: **Silverfreckle!

**Silverfreckle: ***hovering, slightly confused* Wha?

**Flamekit: **M&M's! 8D

**Callie: **Did you give the kits ice cream?

**Silverfreckle: **. . .

**Sparkle: **Ooh…

**Eaglekit/Flamekit: **YES, SHE DID! 8D

**Leopardstar: **Excuse me! Still here.

**Callie: **Oh right... but still! YOU GAVE THE KITS ICE CREAM? *fuming*

**Silverfreckle: **Umm… *puts on armor* Yes ma'am?

**Callie: **AND YOU DIDN'T GET ME ANY?

**Silverfreckle: ***melts*

**Leopardstar: ***flips hair/fur* Oh, how immature.

**Callie: **EXCUSE ME!? Don't tell me what's mature and what's immature, granny!

**Leopardstar: ***GASP* I AM NOT A GRANNY!

**Sparkle: ***giggles* You're OLDER than MY granny! Hehe.

**Leopardstar: ***twitch* NO.

**Sparkle: **You wouldn't know immature, Leopardstar. Granny *giggles*

**Leopardstar: **! I'm not that old!

**Sparkle: **Well, you were a full-grown warrior when Firestar came to the Clans, and you died when he was old, so that made you *does math* ANCIENT!

**Other Hosts: ***die laughing*

**Leopardstar: ***gasp* GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!

**Callie: ***scolding* Sparkle! *bursts out laughing* YOU TELL HER GIRL!

**Bluebell: **O.O ?

**Sparkle: **OKAY. WHY ARE WE SHOUTING?

**Callie: **I DON'T KNOW. YOU STARTED IT.

**Sparkle: **NO I DIDN'T.

**Leopardstar: **THEN WHO DID?

**Bluebell: **O.O ?

**Sparkle: **I HAVE NO IDEA. WHO WANTS TO ASK LEOPARDSTAR THE FIRST QUESTION?

**Callie: **I WILL. LEOPARDSTAR, ARE YOU A STUCK-UP OLD GRANNY?

**Leopardstar: **I AM NOT A STUCK-UP OLD GRANNY!

**Callie: **WELL, WHERE TO BEGIN?

**Bluebell: **O.O ?

**Moonrain/Silverfreckle/Eaglekit/Flamekit: **O_O…. Uhhh, BYEEEE! D8 *runs out door*

**Callie: **FIRST OF ALL YOU WOULD KEEP SCORE WITH FIRESTAR AND EVERY TIME YOU DID SOMETHING NICE FOR THE OTHER CLANS THEY HAD TO PAY YOU BACK…

**Sparkle: **AND THEN WHEN SOMEONE FROM A DIFFERENT CLAN DID SOMETHING NICE FOR YOU, YOU TRIED NOT TO PAY THEM BACK…

**Leopardstar: ***stuck-up old granny face* I DO _TOO _PAY THEM BACK! I LAUNCH ATTACKS ON THEM AND TRY TO STEAL SUNNINGROCKS AND STUFF LIKE THAT! AND THEN I LOSE AND THEN I HAVE TO GO HOME, SULK, AND PLOT ANOTHER ATTACK!

**Bluebell: **O.O ?

**Callie: ***whispers to Sparkle* Stuck-up.

**Sparkle: **Old.

**Both: **GRANNY!

**Leopardstar: **HUH WHAT?

**Bluebell: **O.O ?

**Sparkle/Callie: ***fall over laughing* YOU RESPONDED WHEN WE CALLED YOU GRANNY! YOU ADMIT IT!

**Leopardstar: **FINE. CAN I LEAVE NOW?

**Bluebell: **O.O ?

**Sparkle/Callie: **SURE! WHY ARE WE SHOUTING?

**Callie: **I DON'T KNOW.

**Leopardstar: **WELL, WHO EVEN STARTED IT?

**Sparkle: **I THINK CALLIE DID.

**Callie: **DID NOT!

**Sparkle: **DID TOO!

**Callie: **DID NOT!

**Leopardstar: **DID TOO!

**Callie: **_**DID NOT!**_

**Both: **_**DID TOO!**_

**Bluebell: **O.O ?

**Callie: ***looks back at script* OH! YOU'RE RIGHT! I DID!

**Leopardstar/Sparkle: ***SIGH*

**Callie: **CAN WE STOP SHOUTING NOW? IT'S HURTING MY EYES.

**Leopardstar/Sparkle: **WELL YOU STARTED IT.

**Callie: **And I'm going to finish it. *turns to audience* BYE! :D


	23. S2: E8 - TigerstarAGAIN?

**Season 2: Episode 8**

**Tigerstar…Again?!**

**Callie: ***standing on the flooded stage, which has gone down a LOT* Hi. Why are you here? -.-

**Bravetail: ***pushes away from cameras* AHEM. What she means is that we're –

**Callie: ***screams* Where did you come from?

**Bravetail: **Outer space. WE'RE INTERVIEWING TIGERSTAR!

**Eaglekit: **:O We are?

**Bravetail: **:D We are!

**Callie: ***looks around at the other seven cats* Oi...

**Sparkle: **I think Callie's going to pass out.

**Moonrain: **Eight hosts!

**Bravetail: **I'M NOT LEAVING!

**Callie: ***glares at every co-host* NO MORE! None of your friends/cousins/nineteenth cousins may join!

**Sparkle: **I just have one question.

**Callie: ***nearly explodes* WHAT?

**Sparkle: ***holding Frank*

**Callie: **No.

**Sparkle: **OFFENSIVE! *starts crying, adding to Swiftleaf's river of tears*

**Flamekit: **Excuse me, can we get on with this please?

**Bravetail: **TIGERSTAR, GET YOUR TAIL OUT HERE!

**Tigerstar: ***walks on stage, grumbling*

**Callie: ***smacks* NO NEGATIVITY, YOUNG MAN!

**Tigerstar: **!

**Bravetail: **I agree. *shoves a pie at Tigerstar* Here; go in the back room and eat this.

**Tigerstar: **O.O Okay? *takes pie and walks behind the curtain*

**Callie: **Bravetail, what did you give him?

**Bravetail: ***grins as a loud, hysteric giggling starts from behind the curtain*

**Bluebell:** You don't think it was catnip, do you?

**Eaglekit: ***sighs* Knowing Bravetail, it's probably caffeine.

**Bravetail: **Yep!

**Callie: **It was caffeine?

**Bravetail: **Yep!

**Bluebell: **But, I thought only catnip did that to cats.

**Bravetail: **Yep!

**Eaglekit: **So it _DOES _have catnip.

**Bravetail: **Yep!

**Callie: **But you just said there was caffeine!

**Swiftleaf: **I'M SO CONFUSED! *bawls*

**Bravetail: **It has both! :D

**Tigerstar: ***comes back out, grinning like an idiot*

**Moonrain/Bravetail: ***hit high fives*

**Callie: **All right. Come on, we're leaving. I can't stand this craziness! *grabs Flamekit and Swiftleaf and drags them out the door*

**Moonrain: **COME BACK NEXT EPISODE!

**Callie: ***waves* Goodbye. See you next episode.

**Bravetail: **SO, Tigerstar, what have you been doing lately? Any more plans to take over the world?

**Tigerstar: ***crazed* Yes.

**Bravetail: **Can you share any hints with us?

**Tigerstar: ***nods* I need a radio first.

**Eaglekit: **Uh-oh. *facepalm*

**Bravetail: ***grabs a random radio* Here you go, Tigerstar.

**Callie: **Oh, _crap_.

**Silverfreckle: **I thought we had no language on this show?

**Callie: ***blinks* Things change!

**Tigerstar: ***messes with the radio, flipping on buttons and turning switches before straightening up to the beginning of a song*

**Moonrain: **Is he going to…

**Tigerstar: ***stands up, pulling a pained face and sings a Justin Bieber song* OH LIKE BABY, BABY, BABY! OH LIKE BABY, BABY, BABY!

**Callie/Sparkle/Eaglekit/Silverfreckle/Moonrain/Swiftleaf: ***cower, screaming*

**Bravetail: ***sings with Tigerstar*

**Tigerstar/Bravetail: **OH LIKE BABY, BABY, BABY! OHHHHHHH LIKE BABY, BABY, BABY!

**Eaglekit: ***bashes head on the floor repeatedly*

**Sparkle: **AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHH!

**Silverfreckle: ***cries*

**Moonrain: ***running in circles, plugging her ears*

**Swiftleaf: ***hyperventilating*

**Callie: ***is beginning to twitch, muttering something about chrysanthemums outside the nearest Insane Asylum*

*screen shatters*

**Tigerstar: ***turns off music* MWAHAHAHAHA! Now everyone is hypnotized by the Stupid! HAHAHAHAHA! My plans of world domination are working! FEAR ME! MWAHAHAHA!

_**A/N: So this is where we left off last time! I'll update soon! Keep those reviews coming!**_


	24. S2: E9 - The Aftermath

_**A/N: Hi! I am sooooo sorry for the long wait but I was having trouble with how to write this chapter. Does the extra length make up for it? :D?**_

_****By the way, 8D and 8O are faces in this chapter. If you turn your head sideways, it's a face with big eyes and a huge smile, or big eyes and a huge gaping mouth. 8) and D8 could be other variations of it, I guess. 8D**_

**Season 2: Episode 9**

**The Aftermath**

**Moonrain: **Welcome back to our talk show!

**Flamekit: **HEY! Where is everyone?

**Silverfreckle: ***floats down, eating a strawberry-rhubarb pie* Callie died of laughter yesterday after the show, Sparkle is working at her new job, Swiftleaf is getting pies–

**Flamekit: **Wait, WHAT? Callie DIED? Sparkle WORKS? Swiftleaf is buying PIES?

**Moonrain: ***nods sadly* Yes, the world is officially messed up. Callie came back to life, Sparkle just joined the FBI agency, and Swiftleaf is buying pies.

**Flamekit: ***shakes head, confuzzled* I guess I'm still not getting it. Why did Callie die, why does Sparkle want a job, and why is Swiftleaf BUYING PIES? *screams, flipping out* OMIGHOSHTHEWORLDISCOMINGTOANENDCALLIEDIEDANDSWIFTLEAFISBUYINGPIES!

Translation: OHMIGOSH THE WORLD IS COMING TO AN END CALLIE DIED AND SWIFTLEAF IS BUYING PIES!

**Silverfreckle: **It's all Tigerstar's fault.

**Flamekit: **…SPARKLE IS LITERALLY WORKING AND WE ARE TOTALLY DOOMED OMGEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE – wait, what?

**Moonrain: ***shakes head sadly* Silver, show her the footage.

**Silverfreckle: ***pulls a camera out of her pie tin and wipes off the filling*

**Moonrain: **-_- Seriously?

**Silverfreckle: **What? *sprays pie crumbs* Do you know how handy that trick is?

**Moonrain: **T_T Ugh. *shows Flamekit the video*

**On the Video…**

**Tigerstar: **OH LIKE BABY, BABY, BABY! OH, LIKE BABY, BABY, BABY! OHHHHHH LIKE BABY, BABY, BABY! OHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

**Everyone: ***flipping out*

**Callie: ***twitching and murmuring to herself*

**Tigerstar/Bravetail: ***continues to sing*

**Callie: ***randomly starts giggling and sucking her paw, staring into outer space*

**Everyone: ***have this wacky twitchy thing goin' on with their eyes*

**Callie: **AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHA! *grins, staring at nothing*

**Everyone: **O.O

**Callie: ***starts bawling with laughter, going into hysterics and hyperventilating*

*someone throws a bag at her (to put over her head) but she starts breathing in it*

**In real life…**

**Moonrain: ***clicks off video* Should we see what happened to Swiftleaf?

**Flamekit: ***moans* I can't believe I ever looked up to her. Poor Callie…

**Silverfreckle: ***downs the rest of her pie and puts the video back on*

**On the video…**

**Tigerstar: **OH LIKE BABY, BABY, BABY! OH, LIKE BABY, BABY, BABY! OHHHHHH LIKE BABY, BABY, BABY! OHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

**Everyone: ***flipping out*

**Swiftleaf: ***twitching and murmuring to herself*

**Tigerstar/Bravetail: ***continues to sing*

**Swiftleaf: ***giggles, hallucinating* OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOH! WUT IZ DIS FANCIFUL OBJECT? *pokes a broom in real life, but sees a pie instead* HEHE IT PRITTTTTTTYYYYYYYYYYY…..

**Everyone: **o.O?

**Swiftleaf: ***snarfs down pie (cough, broom)* YUMMY! Must have pie. Must have pie. Self-destruct in five, four, three, two…

**Silverfreckle: ***screams and shoves a pie down her throat* O.O Swiftleaf?

**Swiftleaf: ***smiles hugely, giggling, and erupts into a shower of sparkles, coming back down as a cat* PIE PIE PIE PIE PIE PIE PIE PIE PIE PIE PIE PIE PIE PIE PIE PIE PIE PIE **PIE**!

**Everyone: **O.o?

**Swiftleaf: ***skips off singing some random song about pie and disappears into a sweet shop*

**In real life…**

**Moonrain: **And now for Sparkle.

**Silverfreckle: ***moans*

**On the Video…**

**Tigerstar: **OH LIKE BABY, BABY, BABY! OH, LIKE BABY, BABY, BABY! OHHHHHH LIKE BABY, BABY, BABY! OHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

**Everyone: ***flipping out*

**Sparkle: ***twitching and murmuring to herself*

**Tigerstar/Bravetail: ***continues to sing*

**Sparkle: ***suddenly stands up, mouth in a straight line, and yells in the voice of a drill sergeant* ATENNNNNNNNNNNNNNNTION!

**Everyone: ***looks up from their kookiness*

**Sparkle: ***in a very stern voice* This nonsense is un-called for! This show is a horrendous disaster! You all must be punished, for this foolishness will surely break us all. Do you want to all be homeless? I don't think so! NOW PULL YOURSELVES TOGETHER!

**Everyone: ***blink, blink*

*cricket cricket*

**Everyone: ***simultaneously resumes craziness*

**Sparkle: **That is the last straw! I can't take this utter nonsense anymore! *whips out a phone and mutters a few words in it, never blinking and never breaking her Fearsome stare*

*a limousine pulls up and Sparkle climbs into it before they pull away*

**Everyone: **o.o O.o o.O O.O o_o O_o o_O O_O !

**In real life…**

**Everyone: ***doesn't speak for a while*

**Flamekit: ***timidly* What about Eaglekit?

**Silverfreckle: **We can't watch her video.

**Flamekit: **:o Why not?

**Moonrain: **Because we would get in trouble with your parents!

**Flamekit: **8O Poor Eaglekit!

**Silverfreckle: **To sum it up, let's just say her insanity was _rabid_.

**Flamekit: ***at the same time as Moonrain and Silverfreckle* Give me the video.

**Moonrain: ***at the same time as Flamekit and Silverfreckle* Give her the video.

**Silverfreckle: ***at the same time as Flamekit and Moonrain* Here's the video.

**On the Video…**

**Tigerstar: **OH LIKE BABY, BABY, BABY! OH, LIKE BABY, BABY, BABY! OHHHHHH LIKE BABY, BABY, BABY! OHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

**Everyone: ***flipping out*

**Eaglekit: ***unaffected by the song*

**Tigerstar/Bravetail: ***continues to sing*

**Callie: ***randomly starts giggling and sucking her paw, staring into outer space*

**Swiftleaf: ***giggles, hallucinating* OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOH! WUT IZ DIS FANCIFUL OBJECT? *pokes a broom in real life, but sees a pie instead* HEHE IT PRITTTTTTTYYYYYYYYYYY…..

**Sparkle: ***suddenly stands up, mouth in a straight line, and yells in the voice of a drill sergeant* ATENNNNNNNNNNNNNNNTION!

**Eaglekit: ***dazed and confused at each of them, still unaffected by the Insanity* W-Wha… Wh-Who… B-B-Bu…

**Callie: **AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHA! *grins, staring at nothing*

**Swiftleaf: ***snarfs down pie (cough, broom)* YUMMY! Must have pie. Must have pie. Self-destruct in five, four, three, two…

**Silverfreckle: ***screams and shoves a pie down her throat* O.O Swiftleaf?

**Swiftleaf: ***smiles hugely, giggling, and erupts into a shower of sparkles, coming back down as a cat* PIE PIE PIE PIE PIE PIE PIE PIE PIE PIE PIE PIE PIE PIE PIE PIE PIE PIE **PIE**!

**Sparkle: ***in a very stern voice* This nonsense is un-called for! This show is a horrendous disaster! You all must be punished, for this foolishness will surely break us all. Do you want to all be homeless? I don't think so! NOW PULL YOURSELVES TOGETHER!

**Eaglekit: **WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAT?

**Everyone: **O.O

**Eaglekit: ***begins to panic at her friends' actions*

**Everyone: **O.o?

**Eaglekit: ***pant, pant* This… *pant* can't… be… *pant* HAPPENING!

**Everyone: ***blink, blink*

*cricket cricket*

**Everyone: ***simultaneously resumes craziness*

**Eaglekit: ***collapses by wall, curled up into a tiny ball*

**Callie: ***starts bawling with laughter, going into hysterics and hyperventilating*

**Swiftleaf: ***skips off singing some random song about pie and disappears into a sweet shop*

**Sparkle: **That is the last straw! I can't take this utter nonsense anymore! *whips out a phone and mutters a few words in it, never blinking and never breaking her Fearsome stare*

*a limousine pulls up and Sparkle climbs into it before they pull away*

**Everyone: **o.o O.o o.O O.O o_o O_o o_O O_O !

**Eaglekit: ***holds ears, rocking back and forth and screaming*

**?: **MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!

**Eaglekit: **NO! *begins to flop around like a fish out of water, then sits up and starts gasping for air really fast; starts going around, hitting people with a giant lollipop and making it rain macaroni and cheese* ! *gasps* CHEESE! OHMYGOSHHHHH!

**In real life…**

**Flamekit: ***turns off video* That's it! I can't take any more.

**Silverfreckle: **Told you! *bites into a pear pie*

**Flamekit: ***pauses, thinking* But… *fixes Moonrain/Silverfreckle with a stern glare* Why didn't YOU catch the Insanity?

**Silverfreckle: ***gags on the pie and slaps Moonrain*

**Moonrain: **Ow! Hey, what was that fo – *catches Silverfreckle's pointed look* Uh… *looks around frantically* Pie? *snatches Silverfreckle's pie out of her paws*

**Silverfreckle: **HEY!

**Flamekit: ***studies pie thoughtfully* Hmm… *lightbulb* Oh, that's IT!

**Silverfreckle/Moonrain: ***nervously* What's it?

**?: **WE'RE BAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAACK!

**Silverfreckle/Moonrain/Flamekit: **8O !

**Callie: ***giggles evilly, carrying lots of sharp things*

**Swiftleaf: ***grins maniacally, carrying lots of pies*

**Sparkle: ***doesn't lose composure, wearing a dark blue uniform and an 'FBI agent' badge*

**Eaglekit: ***trailing along, carrying an oversized lollipop in her teeth*

**Moonrain: ***eyes bulge* OH NO! IT'S THE FEARSOME FOUR! RUUUUUN! *takes off*

**Flamekit: ***follows, after a slight pause*

**Silverfreckle: **What about the show?

**Fearsome Four: ***runs after them*

**Moonrain: ***runs back, grabs Silverfreckle (making her drop her pies)* WHO CARES ABOUT THE SHOW? RUN FOR YOUR LIFE, WOMAN!

**Silverfreckle: ***being dragged* Noooo! My pies!

**Moonrain: **Flamekit, found a hiding place yet?

**Flamekit: **No! *runs in circles on the stage, panicking*

**Silverfreckle: ***cries* My pies!

**Moonrain: ***looks over shoulder to see the Fearsome Four gaining on them and totally ignores Silverfreckle, who is clawing for her pies* Flamekit! That broom closet!

**Flamekit: **Right! *yanks open a broom closet and puts a bucket over her head, holding a mop like a sword*

**Moonrain: ***groans* Not armor and weapons, you weirdo! HIDE!

**Flamekit: **OH! *knocks bucket off head and throws the mop at the Fearsome Four*

*mop hits Swiftleaf in the face*

**Swiftleaf: ***pauses, hallucinating, and eats mop* OOH, PIE! *snarfs*

**Moonrain: ***approaches closet and hides inside*

**Flamekit: ***slams the door and locks the three of them inside*

**Silverfreckle: ***whimpering for pies*

**Flamekit: **Do you think they can get through?

**Moonrain: **I don't know. I seriously don't know.

**Silverfreckle: ***reaches breaking point* MY PIES! *punches the lock and flies through the now-open doorway*

**Moonrain: **SILVERFRECKLE! COME BACK!

**Silverfreckle: ***scoops up pies and flies as fast as she can towards the door*

**Flamekit: **It's too late! We have to run!

**Moonrain: **No! We have to fight! FOR SILVERFRECKLE!

**Silverfreckle: **AAHHHH!

**Fearsome Four: ***grabs for Silverfreckle's pies*

**Swiftleaf: **PIES PIES PIES PIES PIES I NEED PIES MWAHAHA!

**Moonrain: **Get ready!

_**A/N: CLIFF HANGER! :D *evil grin* Now the real fun begins. Be sure to review your cats so Callie and the gang can interview them! By the way, the next-occuring chapters are going to be CRAZY because the HOSTESSES are CRAZY!**_

_**So that brings us to a few questions – what are Moonrain and Silverfreckle hiding? Why did this specific Justin Bieber song make every catch the Insanity? What will Flamekit do about it? And what the heck is up with Eaglekit?**_

_**Review what you think will happen! Redtail will be the next guest. I'll post the next chapter soon!**_

_**See you then!**_


End file.
